It’s that time of year again, where all of the most sexist comments and quips made by (mostly men) over the last 12 months are coddled together and voted on, determining who exactly has been the Most Fucked in 2020. The Ernie Awards are upon us, and this year it’s gone fully virtual – so we’ve gotten our hands on the nominations for this year’s least-wanted but most-deserved awards.
This year there are a total of 28 Aussies across several categories all vying for the top spot as the Worst Offender of Sexism, with a couple of loose-lipped people clocking in multiple nominations. Now that really takes some work, and there’s absolutely zero surprises that Mark Latham is one of them.
The awards are being handed down online this year, which means it’s going without the annual chaotic dinner that results in red wine spilled in laps and drunk feminists of all ages cackling and booing at all the terribly misogynistic things people have said in the last 12 months.
And like every other year, there’s some absolute fucken pearlers in here, friends.
Without further ado, here are the nominations for the 2020 Ernie Awards for Sexism.
The Industrial Silver Ernie
Neil Scott, Perth night club owner in response to a woman’s complaint about drink spiking: “She’s not a particularly attractive girl. It’s just implausible to imagine that she had her drink spiked…she’s just a very Plain Jane type of girl.”
Also nominated are:
Australian Federation of Travel Agents CEO Jayson Westbury, and AMP directors David Murray and John Fraser.
The Judicial Silver Ernie
Queensland Detective Inspector Mark Thompson who said police are “keeping an open mind” about the murder of Hannah Clarke and her three children.
Owen Hughes, a solicitor who argued on appeal his behaviour was not sexual harassment because he was “to be seen as being like Mr Darcy in Pride and Prejudice“.
The Media Silver Ernie
Bruce McAveney of Channel 7, referring to Collingwood’s Jordan De Goey, who has been charged with indecent assault. “We feel like he’s full of confidence. He’s had an OK year so far. And then he’s had a hiccup, we know.”
Also nominated are:
Cartoonist Michael Leunig, Amazing Race host Beau Ryan, ABC Radio’s Peter Goers, and Steve Price (who “wouldn’t cross the road” to watch women’s footy.)
The Political Silver Ernie
Scott Morrison, on getting more women into Parliament: “I want to see more women in our parliament and I want to see the NSW division work with me and my team to deliver that on merit, on merit, that’s the key.”
Scott Morrison (again), for appointing Pauline Hanson as Deputy Chair of the Family Court system inquiry.
Mark Latham referring to “gentrified Leftist families” where, in the name of ‘gender equity’ and PC ‘role models’: “the mums don’t cook, clean up or help the kids with homework because it ‘gives the wrong example to young girls’.”
Mark Latham (again) declaring during a debate on abortion: “I am the Matriarchy”
Also nominated are:
Josh Frydenberg, Tony Abbott, Malcolm Roberts, Craig Kelly, and Adem Somyurek.
The Warney (for Sexism In Sport)
Israel Folau who claimed, “bushfires crippling Australia were God’s punishment for legalising abortion and same-sex marriage.”
Also nominated are:
Hawthorn Football Club president Jeff Kennett and AFL legend Leigh Matthews.
The Fred (for Celebrity/Clerical/Culinary Offenders)
The Shore Schoolboys for their ‘Triwizard Shorenament’ challenging students to have sex with a woman over 80kgs; aged over 40; or who is deemed to be a ‘3/10 or lower’.
Also nominated are:
Archbishop of Sydney Anthony Fisher and the entire Council of the Order of Australia for giving one to Bettina Arndt.
The Elaine (for Remarks By Women Least Helpful To The Sisterhood)
Bettina Arndt regarding her Order of Australia: “A lot of feminists, for instance, think they own the idea of gender equality, which is all about promoting women at the expense of men, so I was very pleased that they described my work as gender equality through advocacy for men, which is what I’m doing”.
Bettina Arndt (again) objects to a Sex, Love and Dating handbook at Griffith University “Young women at Griffith University are being taught to be uncaring, demanding bitches”.
Bettina Arndt (yet again) on the murder of Hannah Clarke and her children:”Congratulations to the Queensland Police for keeping an open mind and awaiting proper evidence, including the possibility that Rowan Baxter might have been ‘driven too far’.”
Also nominated are:
Pauline Hanson, ABC Chair Ita Buttrose, and Miranda Devine.
The Good Ernie (for Boys Behaving Better)
Actor Sam Neill: “I actually think it would be better if men just shut up for a while…Resist the urge to shout over the top of women. Stop being boofheads and bullies.”
Also nominated are:
Writer and former Sydney Swans player Brandon Jack, satirist Titus O’Reilly, Victorian Liberal MP Tim Smith, and columnist Andrew Hornery.
And out of all of these nominations will come the Gold Ernie, the coveted crème de la crème of sexist remarks in Australia. Last year it was taken out by Alan Jones, who’s surprisingly missing from this year’s nominations. So it’s up to anyone this year – maybe Bettina can take home the gong this time.
