As Melbourne Awakens From Its Long Nap, So Too Does The Fucking Bastard Montague St Bridge

montague st bridge melbourne crash october 2021

The sun is shining down here on this glorious Melbourne spring day, and it’s made even better with the knowledge that the beloved Montague St Bridge has awoke from its slumber for a feed on some idiot box truck that’s gotten wedged perfectly under its jaws.

At around 8:30am this morning, the bravado of someone in a moving truck got the better of them and they went to battle with Monty, which turned out exactly as you’d expect. The truck in question made it almost all of the way through the Monty’s grip before getting stuck right at the point of freedom.

God, so close and yet, so very far.

It’s been a hot minute since the Montague St Bridge has had a feed – likely thanks to the pandemic, lockdowns, and curfew stopping people from hiring this one specific box truck and careening past the 4000 signs, lights, and giant overhead rubber flaps to an untimely entrapment under the bridge.

The last time we were treated to a Monty munch was back in July, so the unruly bastard must have been pretty fucking hungry after 105 days of no dumbass trucks getting lured into the structural Venus fly trap in South Melbourne.

But we are so thankful for its return, this truly does feel like we’re on the other side of the pandemmy tunnel, breaching into the warm light of the new morning, and nature in Melbourne is healing for real this time.

If you think about it, Monty’s pretty much like an Aussie version of No Bones Day. If a truck gets stuck under the bridge then you know it’s going to be a good day – maybe? Or maybe your day is going to get stuck at some point and everyone’s going to laugh at you on the internet. Hard to say, really.