After eight years and 34 issues without an official Editor-in-Chief (they did a pretty awesome job regardless!), Monster Children have named New York based Aussie Jason Crombie as their new editorial overlord. Who is Jason Crombie you ask? Only a contributor for some of the greatest pop culture publications out there (Oyster, Vice and Monster Children (duh!)), founder of this generation’s Interview, Wooooo Magazine, and a dude who makes his cheddar by peering into people’s souls. He’s very good at it. Ah fuck it, we’ll just let Jason explain…
Hello. I’m Jason Crombie.
You might know me from that thing I wrote that one time, or that interview I did with ol’ what’s his face. Then again, you might not know who I am at all, and perhaps you don’t even care. Either way I couldn’t give a robin’s fart: I’ve just been made Editor in Chief of Monster Children Magazine.
I’m not honoured to receive this title, far from it. To be honest, I think it’s about time I received some real, paid recognition. I’ve suffered many years for my craft, often working regular-Joe jobs like washing dishes, waiting tables, and diving to the muddy bottoms of dams to retrieve golf balls just so I could afford to eat and breath and write another day. But now that I’m Editor in Chief of something, all that drudgery is behind me, and like a mighty phoenix I have risen from the ashes to wreak fiery vengeance on all those who said I’d never amount to squat. Namely, Mr. Cameron, the recently deceased careers counsellor from my old high school. How you like me now, fat man?
The first thing I’ll be doing now that I’m a big king-dick Editor in Chief is writing my tell-all, rags-to-riches, you-can-do-it-too autobiography. It’s going to be a hit! So far, though, I haven’t written anything. I only just clambered out of abject poverty fifteen minutes ago, gimmi a break. Here’re a few working titles, though:
It isn’t fair. Wait… Now it is! The Jason Crombie Story.
Yesterday I was Eating ‘Chef Boyadee Beefaroni’ Straight Out of the Can- Today I Have An 8-Ball: The Jason Crombie Story.
Body-Popping on Mr. Cameron’s Grave: The Jason Crombie Story
My ship has finally come in, people, and I intend to board quickly, stow my belongings and
then riffle through everyone else’s. In truth, it is an absolute honor to be handed the reins of a magazine I’ve read and loved for almost a decade.
I’ll try not to fuck it up.
Thank you.
The Editor in Chief.
