Picture this: the world is sliding into the maw of tyranny. Politicians are an ossified elite standing above the peons, relaying dim promises of social and economic mobility while actively working to enrich only themselves. The media, beholden to corporate interests and facing an increasingly postmodern attitude to the truth, cannot do anything to stem the tide. The people are risen, and they are angry.
Who is their hero? None other than Troy Delmege, the weirdo from Married at First Sight with the alarming tooth brushing technique and propensity for public groping. He is running for Parliament in the electorate of North Sydney in the upcoming federal election, for inscrutable reasons which are not really elaborated upon by the announcement video he posted to Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BuGKT4vn57F/
“I’m sick of the same old politics and it’s time for the next generation to step up,” he says. “I’m going to be someone who brings the community together.”
He’s set up a fairly comprehensive campaign website – and I say ‘fairly’ because for reasons unknown it does not mention MAFS at all. Here’s the message that greets you on his campaign website:
Australia is the lucky country…We have a beautiful country and great people…We can create the future that we want. Yet quality of life across the electorate of North Sydney continues to decline… Our roads are clogged, travel takes too long, schools are full and our hospitals are crammed. Meanwhile, we look to Canberra and see government not working, all while things get worse across the community. Troy knows tomorrow can be SO MUCH BETTER and is ready to challenge the status quo! Troy will be a pragmatic problem solver who brings people together and gets results. End traffic congestion, invest in renewable energy, fight bureaucracy, and abolish the senate.
Wait, hang on, what was that last thing you tossed in there?
abolish the senate
Okay, cool.
Mosey on over to his policy page, and you’ll see a real melange of inspiring platforms, from “strong national borders” to allowing Australians to “participate in international online poker gaming” to, yes, abolishing the federal Senate.
Also, weirdly, his page has a picture of the Aboriginal flag on it, despite the fact none of his policies pertain to Indigenous people, and the fact he was called out for racist Instagram stories last year. Go figure!
The seat of North Sydney is considered a safe Liberal seat, and is presently held by Trent Zimmerman. I personally do not expect Troy to take it home in May, but I am happy to be proven wrong on this.
