Folks, we regret to inform you that London is currently suffering through an unseasonably suffocating April heatwave, with the mercury tipping over to a staggering 29.1 degrees Celsius.
According to the BBC, that makes it the hottest April day since 1949. According to me, who has been to London twice in my life, as soon as it tips over like 22 degrees, Brits consider it social licence to take their shirts off and shit. Not on.
As if this scorching heat wasn’t enough to put the poms in a tizzy, pollen levels are incredibly high, meaning they’re sweaty, shirtless and also sneezing. This is basically the Black Death all over again.
The BBC report also contains this very British sentence in an otherwise incredibly British article on heat, which bears mentioning: “The heat caused the cancellation of a horse race at Cheltenham but those over shorter distances went ahead.”
I’m incredibly aware that London isn’t really built for heat, and it can be muggy as hell, and the Underground becomes unbelievably stifling as the sun’s rays seep into the surrounding bedrock… but at the same time I must say this: 29 degrees? Toughen up, sweethearts.
