Okay. Fishing enthusiasts, just come and look at this fish and sort of read between the lines here, because a lot of what is about to be said is probably old, normal news to you… NERDS!
Ok sorry I just had to get that out of my system.
Everyone else who knows nothing about fishing – this yarn has left me muy SHOOKETH. Basically, Cale Brown from Khancoban, NSW has caught a really fucking big trout. It is genuinely a very big fish. I’m sure it’s not the biggest fish eveeeeer in the woooorld or whatever but it’s big enough for some “fishing guru” to jizz about. Here’s a very jolly Cale with his big greasy-looking trout.
Side note – how does one become a fishing guru? Does he make money from being a fishing guru? What does it entail. How much do I need to know, can I just go around saying “CRIKEY! SHE’S A BEWDY MATE!” and have people take me seriously? These are the questions that keep me up at night.
Anywho. The trout is 23 pounds, so quite large, and 90cm long – long enough for me to say that the giant monster should have been left the fuck alone since it probably has equally large friends who will now come for you, Mr. Man.
Cale apparently caught the fish using a hand-tied fly and a six-pound line – fucked if I know what any of that means, but it’s apparently impressive. It also took him an hour.
“I didn’t have my waders on or anything, but I was eventually able to grab him by the tail,” Cale told The Western Advocate.
I’m sorry – GRAB HIM BY THE TAIL? What fresh hell is this? I would not be grabbing anything the size of a large toddler that is alive and has a big mouth by the fucking tail, I can tell you that for free.
Fishing guru (see? What is this job?) Russell Mason had quite a bit to say about the portly fish.
“It’s got to be one of the biggest trout ever caught in mainland Australia,” he said. “The fact he caught it on fly as well, it’s probably one of the biggest ever caught that way as well.”
Cale is being “coy” about where exactly he caught this monster trout in Khancoban – you sneaky unit, Cale – but if you’re now inspired to go hunt a killer trout yourself (probably literally killer, tbh) our mate “fishing” “guru” Russell is saying the entire Khancoban area is primo right now for trout fishing.
The food is there for trout to grow to a pretty good size at the moment. Usually they’ll feed on yabbies and the like, but there’s a lot of redfin in there as well, once the trout get to that size they start feeding on other smaller fish as well. A lot of trout streams and lakes have been really good so far this season.
None of that makes any sense to me, but there you go. You should just believe him, he’s the guru.
Fishing, hey? Had no idea it was such a rollercoaster ride.
