The federal Labor Party is currently *checks notes* trolling the Liberal National Party (LNP) through the medium of a Kmart wishing tree. Effective political opposition, check!
On Wednesday, the Prime Minister Scott Morrison launched federal parliament’s annual Kmart wishing tree appeal. The wishing tree is a collab between The Salvation Army and Kmart and has been a staple of the Aussie Chrimbo tradition since 1987.
As anyone who’s ever been in a Kmart between November and December knows, the aim of the wishing tree is securing toys and presents for disadvantaged kids. Obviously, it’s a great charitable act for Aussies to give back to those in need.
I will say, though: it feels slightly weird for the government to host one seeing as they literally have the power to eradicate childhood poverty, but go off I guess.
Because we’re gearing up to an election and every photo opp is a chance for pollies to take snide digs at eachother, Labor leader Anthony Albanese used the wishing tree to highlight some of the Government’s most cooked policy decisions of the last year.
PM Morrison launched parliament’s Kmart Wishing Tree Appeal this morning. Party leaders brought presents
Labor’s presents included a submarine, next to a jigsaw puzzle of France’s Eiffel Tower, and a ‘build your own’ solar windmill kit 🤔🕵️♂️
(Pic via AAP) pic.twitter.com/ai43P0WARF
— Josh Butler (@JoshButler) December 1, 2021
Featured in the gift pile from Labor was a jigsaw puzzle of the Eiffel Tower and a submarine toy, taking aim at Right Honourable Grinch Scott Morrison’s decision to U-Turn on a $90 billion submarine deal with the French.
Also on the Labor-approved Christmas list was a ‘build your own solar windmill kit’, which presumably a LNP intern clocked under the wishing tree and immediately threw in a bin.
Finally, Labor donated a fire truck, a reference to Morrison’s infamous clusterfuck of decisions during the 2019-2020 bushfires, which included jetting off to Hawaii and telling a radio station “I don’t hold a hose, mate.”
Deputy PM Barnaby Joyce also couldn’t help but make a little dig (literally, tee hee), donating a ‘gem mining kit’, which would be funny if it wasn’t so sadness-inducing.
For his part, Morrison donated a wooden bocce ball set and a marble game (??? honestly what), which apparently helped him over lockdown. Clearly it didn’t help him run the country, but I hope he had fun with his silly little balls.
To be perfectly honest, a Christmas appeal for disadvantaged kids feels like a pretty cooked setting for making cheap political shots. But hey, I’m just an Australian citizen looking for a shred of political integrity and alas, that might be a stretch for Santa’s elves this year.
Regardless, if you want to make a donation there’s a wishing tree at every Kmart, so go forth and be better people than our politicians.
