Julian Assange Celebrates Six Month Anniversary With Tolerant Ecuadorian Envoys

Wikileaks founder and method actor, Julian Assange – who continues on admirably with his experiential audition for a role as the antagonist in the sequel to Skyfall – partook of a rare unchaperoned moon dance on a marvellous December evening in London overnight. Assange’s big night out on the town (house balcony) formed but one part of his six month anniversary celebrations with new life partners, The Nice Ecuadorian Embassy Staff, who “have learned to appreciate” Julian (a notoriously difficult houseguest, according to Kathy Lette) and grown accustomed to his face during his stay in a cupboard under the stairs. 

The second part of Assange’s Christmas/Anniversary gift will be the leaking of more than one million documents next year, because he’s generous like that during the holiday season.
Today’s Australian contains a report detailing the finer points of Assange’s rare public appearance on the Ecuadorian balcony, which was adorned with tinsel and baubels and lit softly with light through yonder windows because ’tis the season for a many merry tacky ornament to adorn public declarations of [alleged] international espionage.
From his perch, Assange looked down on the police who are waiting to arrest him should he step foot off the premises and told a crowd of 250 assembled laymen, “Next year will be equally busy. WikiLeaks has already over a million documents being prepared to be released. Documents that affect every country in the world.
Of his six month stay at the Embassy, and concerning the threat of extradition, Assange said, “The door is open, and the door has always been open, for anyone who wishes to use standard procedures to speak to me or guarantee my safe passage,” which is almost definitely what Lady Gaga was doing when she stopped by for tea and safe passage chat earlier this year.
In a statement, Ecuadorian ambassador Ana Alban said, “On behalf of my country, I reiterate our support for Julian Assange. Julian has become a guest in this house that we all have learned to appreciate.” 
What she really wanted to say was this, as told through the art of musical theatre; Knightsbridge location, personal hygiene makeover and everything. 
The whole shebang. 


Photos by Peter Macdirmid via Getty