John Howard Doesn’t Believe In Squirting And Twitter Is Losing Its Mind

It’s safe to say that no reasonable person has wondered what former Prime Minister and prominent eyebrow enthusiast John Howard thinks about squirting. It would be better for all of us to imagine him as a sexless anthropomorphic bald spot, instead of as an actual sexual human being, but I guess this bubble had to be burst some day.
As part of the proceedings of wildcard Liberal Democrat Senator David Leyonhjelm‘s broad-to-the-point-of-vague Nanny State Inquiry, a spokesperson for the porn industry has blamed Australia‘s strict X-rated video laws on John Howard’s distaste for water sports and female ejaculation.
As the Eros Association‘s Joel Murray told Crikey:
“Some fetishes used to be allowed within the X classification, and it is my understanding that under John Howard as prime minister, the X classification was restricted in particular because the prime minister was deeply offended by the idea of water sports and female ejaculation. In fact he claims that female ejaculation was not a true thing.”
Twitter, as always, has responded wonderfully, with a bunch of people unsurprisingly coming to the same sympathetic conclusion about his wife, Janette:

Please enjoy these fresh takes from hilarious jokers who literally sit around all day waiting to see hear what ex-politicians think about lady jizz:

Oh and just in case you were wondering (you weren’t, no one was), Leyonhjelm himself has weighed in on the debate, with some mental images that will haunt you until death finally grants you sweet release:


Source: Crikey.

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