Folks, there is a matter of extreme and pressing national security afflicting our nation: there is a deranged hacker on the loose who is illicitly accessing the Twitter accounts of politicians and liking a single tweet before immediately logging out. First it afflicted Christopher Pyne, who liked a late night porn tweet, and then it was Greg Hunt who also liked a late night porn tweet. Now it’s Joe Hockey, who liked a critical tweet about Malcolm Turnbull after being hacked by this fly-by-night scoundrel.
A few people on Twitter noticed that Hockey liked a tweet from economist Stephen Koukoulas which called Turnbull a “cranky prick”.
Despite the fact you could reasonably imagine that Joe might think that Malcolm is a cranky prick, or even the charitable reading that his thumb slipped while he was searching for the freshest Nickelback content available on Twitter, he’s denied that he liked the tweet.
Don’t get too excited. It looks like I have been hacked.AFP now investigating.
— Joe Hockey (@JoeHockey) December 11, 2017
Hacked! Hacked! God, you’d just love to be the AFP officer who can write off an entire week ‘investigating’ this claim. “Yeah boss, I’m so close to cracking the Joe Hockey tweet hacking case,” they’d say. “Just give me a few more days and I’m sure I’ll find this crook.”
We’re clearly in the midst of a campaign of terror by someone we have elected to name The Like Maniac. This is clearly a depraved individual, who will stop at nothing to undermine the functioning of the Australian government through their deft manipulation of Twitter likes. The Like Maniac has no morals. We condemn their actions in the harshest possible terms.
Pray you do not fall victim to their cyber crimes.