Thieves Nick Off With $40,000 Worth Of Insects For Some Unfathomable Reason

$40,000 Worth Of Live Insects And Lizards Have Been Stolen From A Museum In Philadelphia

Here it is, dear readers, the most triggering article I have ever written. No good, dirty rotten thieves have stolen SEVERAL THOUSAND  insects and lizards, yes LIVE INSECTS,  worth $40,000 from the Philadelphia Insectarium & Butterfly Pavilion i.e. museum that houses a bunch of live bugs.

[jwplayer qtXAEtfy]

While stealing living things or just stealing, in general, is a shitty thing to do, the real horror of their act is that I have now spent the last 20-odd minutes having to look at a whole bunch of video/images of said stolen creepy crawlies (/lizards, but they’re cute so that’s fine).

You absolute bastards.

Security cameras revealed a bunch of people sneaking out of the museum with plastic containers holding the bugs, including giant African mantises, bumblebee millipedes, warty glowspot roaches, tarantulas, dwarf and tiger hissers, and leopard geckos. Don’t know what they are? Google it, I dare you.

The thieves also nicked off with a highly venomous 6-Eyed Sand Spider, so that’s great. Yeah, this guy:

Add to that the VERY dramatic detail of two employee uniforms casually impaled onto the wall with kitchen knives, Police strongly suspect it to be an inside job. A statement from the Philadelphia Police Department said they’re looking into 3 or 4 current and former employees, and have begun searching homes.

Ok, I have questions. First of all, it is unfathomable to me that insects are worth money? Seriously, where are you going to sell an estimated 7,000 bugs? For that matter, where the hell would you store them? I know they’re small, but by now they must surely also be enraged.

Or was this all in the hopes of creating a Spiderman army and taking over the world? Because that is maybe something that part of me could get behind? But also probably not, and highly unlikely to be a realistic goal.

Yep, done. Prepare yourselves for a plague.