As Beyonce Knowles shimmied her transfixing thighs she reprimanded all her past suitors with this memorable reprove: if they liked it then they shoulda put a ring on it, but do real life modern women place the same importance on “putting a ring on it” as Ms Knowles?
The whole idea of female “singletons” searching for appropriate marriage material may be considered an antiquated notion in this post-Bridget Jones age of “Independent Women” (another enduring catchphrase made popular by the same woman demanding a ring!).
The truth is, there are thousands of young modern women who genuinely idealise getting married and settling down with the man of their dreams.
One Australian woman who shares that ideal is quietly documenting her quest to find a husband on a blog titled Hunting For A Husband.
The Sydney based scribe of the site (which is about as addictive as a chocolate coated crack cigarette) writes under the pseudonym “KC” or “Kool Chick”. Online anonymity is a precaution she takes to avoid ruffling the feathers of suitors who might have an adverse reaction to being critically reviewed on the internet.
And it’s understandable because some of the content could be kinda hurtful. Take the following excerpt which KC recently posted on 15 July in which she critiques her date with “Adam, 32″…
He begins to tell me about his life… he is from a divorced family, his dad was never there, he always felt the absence of his father and knew he didn’t want to be like his Dad. He worked in investment banking for a few years, but found it very stressful and so he quit to set up a dot.com company which failed. Then he started his own removalist business and “I make about $150K so I’m doin alright” (notice how he just slipped his income in there? I’m thinking buddy I paid for those wedges you are scoffing down and that juice! aren’t you going to ask me any get-to-know you questions?) he goes on to tell me how he is looking to change his job again as he has a knee injury. I question why he would give up an investment banker job to be a removalist? he said:
“I find the job really rewarding you know, i help people move from one phase of their lives to another. Sometimes they just bought their first home and are all excited, other times they have a failed business and have to move to smaller premises. It’s really interesting i feel like I really help these people…”
OMG?! Really help these people? You’re the Removalist Buddy not the Therapist. They don’t give a shit about you, you’re the dude they pay to move their junk, I don’t know anyone who opens up to the removalist guy? I don’t want to be a snob, but I mean come onnnnnnnnnn!
KC meets her potential husbands through online dating sites, and her blog provides as much a critique on those websites as it does of the men she meets through them.
Hunting For A Husband is pretty new to the internet and according to KC has only had around 550 visitors (which could spike right now depending on how curious you are). She insists the purpose of the blog is not to generate awesome web stats and is simply an online journal to keep friends up to date. Some people have already suggested it could be a work of fiction akin to Tom MacMaster who was posing as A Gay Girl In Damascus, the fictional blog of nonexistent Syrian lesbian Amina Abdallah Aral al Omari.
Such was our growing fascination with Hunting For A Husband and KC’s up front Carrie Bradshaw-esque dating disclosure that we wanted to learn more.
We got in contact with KC who answered a few of our questions about the blog, her husband hunt, and how she rates herself on the dating scale. Here’s what she said…
Pedestrian: Why did you want to document the hunt? KC: I have been keeping a written journal since 1998 and all of my dating dramas are all in these volumes of books. As I have grown older and busier it has become increasingly difficult to find the time to write in my journal so instead I would write an email to my friend with the latest news and then print that and stick it in the journal. I have been doing that for several years. I am not a computer-tech head and was concerned that a blog would be beyond my capability. I decided to research it and it was really simple, within 24 hours of the idea entering my head I had a domain name and a concept. A blog is easier than a writing in a journal.
Do you think it’s becoming harder for women to meet Mr right? It has always been hard, I don’t know that it is becoming harder than it always was. The concept of finding a person that you want to commit to for life is a serious one. It is supposed to be a difficult journey that is what makes it all worthwhile when you meet someone with real potential. There are plenty of Mr Wrongs out there. My parents are still happily married after over 30 years so I am still a believer in marriage (although I will be drafting a pre-nup – unless he is wealthier than I am).
Will you reveal to a potential partner/husband that you’re writing a blog about the courtship? I set up the blog at the end of June 2011, so it is early days…I am undecided if I will be revealing it to a potential husband. If I tell the person they are the subject of the blog, and I know they are reading it – then that may prejudice the authenticity of the blog. I don’t want that. This one I will have to make a judgement call on as time passes. I expect that I will mention that I write a blog to some of my dates, but I will be vague on the nature of its contents. That way I can still be honest about what I do in my spare time and the blog isn’t a big secret. If they ever find out about the blog, I can then say “But I told you about that didn’t I?”
What happens if future boyfriends don’t want the relationship documented is that a deal breaker or would you end the blog? I will end the blog when I find a husband or the expiration of 2 years whichever first occurs, the boyfriends along the way (if they know about the blog) will have to take me for who I am and the blog is part of the package. I am on a 2 year mission they can wait it out if they want. I would have thought an insight into what I am thinking and feeling is a ‘heads up’ most guys don’t get so they can build a bridge so to speak…
Is the end goal to potentially launch greater opportunities such as book deals etc? No, the end goal is to get married. I am not fussed about the blog turning into bigger and better things. The best thing that happens is whatever does.
Is the picture on the blog yourself and who’s the male in the photo? No the picture is not me. That picture was there when I set up the page with domain. I don’t know how to get rid of it (remember that bit about me not being a tech-head) and YES who is that man in the photo?? I honestly have no idea.
Are these random people you?
Have you had much feedback/response from the blog already? Yes, a few unknown people have emailed the site and said that I should be more careful about giving lifts home to strangers, meeting men from the internet and inviting strange men into my home. All valid points, some people think I am uptight and bitchy to my dates. I am being 100% myself and go with my gut instincts – I can live with the criticisms.
We’ve already seen people suggest that this could actually be fiction – how can you prove that this is indeed a real person writing? Fiction?! This is my life! The only fiction is the guys’ names, I have changed their names to offer some privacy. I am open to idea’s about how to prove these dates are happening, however I don’t think I need to convince anybody. You can believe what you like. Frankly if I was making it up the stories would be heaps better. For example the Brett story wouldn’t have ended like that… instead he would have made it to my place and there would have been some romance…maybe he would have brought me some flowers and a treat for my dog he would have said “Damn! KC you look hot in those trackies!” …
You’re judging men in a public forum and ranking them out of 10? How would you rate yourself out of 10 across a range of categories Looks/Personality/Humour/Conversation? Let’s be clear I am not ranking the men out of 10, I am ranking the date. I am on those dates so in fact I contribute to those rankings. For kicks and because I am an open and honest person, I am happy to rate myself:
She sounds like a catch. And we intend to follow KC’s quest for a suitable guy to “put a ring on it”.
The whole “husband hunting” concept may seem pretty cringey. My initial response to her “hunt” was Hey Desperado: Way to set the women’s movement back 50 years, but the truth is – whether or not a diamond ring is involved – everyone just wants someone to love and be loved back.
Yep, that’s pretty damn cringey too but ain’t it the truth.