Here’s All The Shit That Happened On Day 27 Of The Federal Election Campaign

Hello everyone, TGIM! (Thank God It’s Monday). We are now in the last week of the election campaign but there’s still stories bouncing around about Liberal candidates with anti-Muslim, homophobic pasts (whichever one you’re thinking of, it’s actually a seperate one entirely) and John Howard is still mindlessly strolling around Manly trying to save Tony Abbott‘s life or something.

Bill Shorten started off his week talking about climate change and housing. He criticised Australia for being ranked 55th out of 60 countries with the way we’re handling climate change. Not good!

“The future generations of Australia deserve better from the current crop of political debate,” he said, promising to reduce emissions if elected and make sure 50% of the energy used in the future is renewable. One can dream.

Both parties were rambling about a first home buyer deposit scheme that was initially declared by the Coalition before Shorten just came out and said Labor would match it. 

The policy would make loans easier to get for first homebuyers, but here’s the thing: houses still be costing the same, y’know? All those old boomers that own sixteen houses each are still gonna be making bank off The Youth trying their best to enter the housing market, debt be damned.

Regardless of who is backing it, there’s been plenty of criticism of the election promise. Some say it won’t work unless the big banks are clued in, while others say it will result in a lot of young people suffering through risky debt. Something to look forward to!

Your grandpa’s favourite / least favourite human John Howard was indeed out-and-about, campaigning once again for Tony Abbott. Abbott still faces pressure from Independent Zali Steggall, but is trying to make sure everyone knows he has this under control with his well-known “I’ve got this” face.

Labor senator Kristina Keneally wanted everyone to think about Tony Abbott, too, but was hoping the focus would be more on what a shitshow his government’s budget was. Later, she literally said “Winter is coming for Mr. Morrison” (ugh) before calling ScoMo “just Tony Abbott in a baseball cap” (much better, should’ve just gone with that.)

And finally everyone’s favourite”I’m not a racist but…” contender, Fraser Anning, uploaded a heinously fucked up meme to his Facebook before deleting it. I’m not gonna tell you anything else about it. Hell, I’m not even going to link to it, because frankly I’m not convinced that he’s not just deliberately putting out this awful shit with full the intention of deleting it later having flagged a few more likeminded dumbfucks.

Today is Monday, tomorrow is Tuesday. Only a few days to go, thank god.

More Stuff From PEDESTRIAN.TV