Proving our theory that he’s really just an illiterate, whining baby zipped into a bloated fascist’s orange body, Donald Trump has gone and kicked out a baby who dared cry during a campaign stop.

He was delivering another ignorant speech in Virginia when the offender’s cries pierced the auditorium; at first, it seemed the father-of-five was *actually* demonstrating human-like qualities of understanding and compassion.

“I love babies. I love babies,” he said to the audience. “I hear that baby crying. I like it. What a baby, what a beautiful baby.”

He even reassured the kid’s fearful mother that he was chill with all the noise.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s young and beautiful and healthy and that’s what we want.”

It might have ended there, except “it” kept crying… and crying… and crying, until Trump could maintain his paternal facade no more – and kicked the baby out.

“Actually, I was kidding, you can get that baby out of here,” he said to uncomfortable laughs from the crowd.

“I think she [the mother] really believed me that I love having a baby crying while I’m speaking.”

Check out his backflip in full:


Why can’t we kick Trump out of Earth’s orbit, though? No fair.

Donald Trump Cements Man-Baby Status By Chucking Crying Kid Out Of Rally

Photo: Getty / Ian Chan.