Like moths to a flame, the story surrounding darling Egg Boy has dragged in input from the most unlikely and definitely unwelcome of places. Namely, Dean Cain and Brian McFadden, two names your Mum might remember if she thinks about it for a hot second or ten.
[jwplayer iBGEdOGB]
As footage of Egg Boy’s thwack to the scone of Fraser Anning spread across the globe like wildfire over the weekend, Cain – who played Superman on TV for a few years in the 90s and has one of the all-time great kettle heads – weighed in for whatever reason. His assessment of the situation? He could, at any given moment, bash the teen if he so wished.
I would have knocked that kid cold.
— Dean Cain (@RealDeanCain) March 17, 2019
Following that utterly bizarre interjection, deeply Irish once-was boy band member McFadden waded into the mucky debate with his own assessment: He too could thrash the child.
Yes bro! His act was violence. Egg or not. Deserved a slap
— Brian mcfadden (@BrianMcFadden) March 17, 2019
Cool.
In what’ll surprise none of you that little back and forth led to both of them getting their asses washed by the collective internet, in what quickly became an All-Star Weekend-grade dunk contest.
Is see this is the My Career Has Died Convention.
— Jade (@serenityn0w_) March 17, 2019
Twitter is great. Where else can you see Superwank Dean Cain and date rape champion Brian McFadden high-fiving each other for their shared love of a Nazi Australian senator? How is this place still free?
— Jeanna Louise Skinner is UPDATES ONLY (@JeannaLStars) March 17, 2019
well if it isn’t daytime television Superman and discount Ronan Keating
— michael (@coldlunch) March 17, 2019
Brian, must be hard to come to terms with an egg having more hits than you
— MCS (@mcs86) March 17, 2019
https://twitter.com/gearoidfarrelly/status/1107359292234104834
So Brian McFadden has taken to condemning #eggboy for violence …. that’s rich for a fella who made a living from murdering cover versions.
— martinmcmahon (@williamhboney1) March 17, 2019
https://twitter.com/Donnan_S/status/1107316513852272644
Dean Cain’s boast that he would have knocked out a teenager led me to his bio, starts off with some fun alliteration but oddly finishes with him calling himself stupid pic.twitter.com/pE6f57Z2mV
— Paul F. Tompkins (@PFTompkins) March 17, 2019
Lori Loughin is bribing college officials and Dean Cain is assaulting minors.
Fuck video games being a bad influence…
I call for the Hallmark Channel to be cancelled.
— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) March 17, 2019
I hope someone throws an egg at Dean Cain while he is delivering pizzas for Papa Johns.
— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) March 17, 2019
Weird your first instinct is to punch the kid that egged the nazi and not the nazi
— koush (@koush) March 17, 2019
https://twitter.com/joehullait/status/1107276085614395392
It is NOT OK to speak ill of the DEAD, so please STOP making fun of Dean Cain’s CAREER.
— Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) March 18, 2019
And then somehow amid all that there was *checks notes* Urthboy? running into things to call McFadden a *checks notes again* “weak kent“?
You’re a weak cnt mcfadden
— Urthboy (@urthboy) March 17, 2019
What the fuck is going on. Good grief.
To recap: Dean Cain and Brian McFadden, average career peak approximately June 21 1998, both believe they could easily bash an egg-wielding teenager if they wanted to, and that egging Nazis is bad, actually.
Honestly, there’s no response to this that isn’t covered by the image of a squinting John Mulaney going “Is that……… Dean Cain?”
Fuckin’ Dean Cain.