At all times, every single person at the Daily Telegraph is having an extremely normal one; people walking into the building, clocking on, and sitting down at their desks, fists balled red and body quivering with rage, ready for another day in the trenches of Australia’s inglorious culture wars. What’s on the agenda today? Shitting on black kids? That’s on pause for now. Harassing scholars into leaving the country over an 8-word Facebook post? It’s been done. People trying to get urgent medical treatment to asylum seekers being held in squalid conditions in Federally-funded off-shore detention centres? Ring the bloody bell, troops. We’re going to work.
In today’s edition of Baffling Shit That Piss-Awful Rag Publishes, the graphics department has apparently decided to forgo what little skerrick of ambiguity they had left and instead dive headfirst into Godwin’s Law with this flaking turd of a graph:
For context, this latest round of hand-wringing comes after Australian Medical Association rep Dr Paul Bauert appeared on Sky News and made the admittedly bizarre comparison that victims of the Holocaust were afforded some sense of mental reprieve that those trapped on Nauru or Manus Island do not:
Even those who finally knew they were about to be condemned to the gas chamber at least found some sense of relief in knowing what was happening.
Just a mind-bogglingly silly thing to say, and apparently enough for the Daily Tele, in all their mouth-foaming wisdom, to leap all over it and draw the assertion that Manus and Nauru are fine, actually, because they are not literal Hitler.
Stand up from desk, wash grime off hands and face, clock out. Just another day manning the cogs of the Bullshit Factory.