Tom Hanks’ son Chet would like you to know that he is not in the Illuminati, which seems exactly like the kind of thing somebody in the Illuminati would say.
If your biggest concern around the Hanks family right now was whether or not Chet was in the Illuminati, you can rest assured that he is in fact NOT involved in the secret society.
Rather than, you know, worrying about his parents who both have the dreaded COVID-19 virus, Chet went on a rampage on social media about the Illuminati.
“You motherfuckers are going to believe what you want ’cause you’re already so fucking committed to your weird Internet conspiracies, but I’m not actually in the fucking Illuminati, dude,” Chet said in an Instagram video.
He followed up by explaining that his tattoo was a symbol of his spirituality and religion, not his involvement in the secret society. If you weren’t already aware, he’s got the goddamn Illuminati Eye of Providence on his chest, which is visible in most of his photos because he seems to have a serious distaste for wearing shirts.
“I got this fucking tattoo because I’m extremely spiritual,” Chet, real name Chester Hanks, continued, referencing the tattoo on his chest. “I believe in God. I believe that God oversees everything, has a plan for everything.”
Chet went on to explain that the previous video was trolling people who have been spreading conspiracy theories about the blessed Hanks family following Tom and Rita’s diagnosis with coronavirus.
The speculation comes after a clearly satirical video he posted on Instagram earlier in the week in which he alluded to being in the Illuminati (as well as eating pineal glands and sacrificing people).
Chet did not hold back when it came to calling out the “ridiculous, sick fucking shit” people have been saying about his family.
“I was trolling in that last video obviously because I’m pissed off at what you motherfuckers are fucking saying about my family—the ridiculous, sick fucking shit that you guys like to sit around and fucking think about is fucking disgusting.”
“Look, I get it. I question everything and I don’t fucking trust shit…Doesn’t mean that every fucking conspiracy out there is the fucking truth.”
Although he may be the most eccentric member of the Hanks family, I’m fairly certain he’s not a member of the Illuminati. Like he said, look at his “shitty ass fucking furniture.” If this man were in the Illuminati, he’d at least be able to afford to wear a shirt.
Sweet angels Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson remain in Australia under quarantine while recovering from the COVID-19 coronavirus.