Crimes are bad kids. BUT some crimes are also super fucking hilarious as is the case with this yarn from across the ditch where a cheeky Kiwi has admitted to a 20-year-long con of painting his own fake “no parking” lines on his home street.
Wellington resident Russell Taylor revealed his dastardly crimes to New Zealand press today, which consisted of him hand-painting yellow spaced lines on one side of his street to stop people from parking there in an attempt to keep his street safe.
Ok, so in my head it all went down a bit like this:
In reality however it looked more like a five-year-old left alone with yellow crayons:
Photo via Stuff.co.nz
Old mate Russ isn’t ashamed for his one-man crusade on social safety, using the example of issues a firetruck had recently attempting to get to the street to, you know, fight fires and shit.
Again, this whole thing is super illegal, as confirmed by Wellington City Council who have been aware of the “fake traffic devices” for some time, but like any good local council, couldn’t be arsed doing anything about it:
Suffice to say that, yes, we’re aware of problems and complaints about parking in Holloway Road – and that the Fire Service had trouble getting to a house fire there in the past year because of parked vehicles and given the glorious and healthy history of civic activism in Holloway Rd, we would rather not pick an unnecessary fight with the locals.
Welp, chalk this one up as a win Rusty!
The council has confirmed it is now looking into a permanent solution which should save Russell a lot of yellow paint expenditure.
Oh, and if you happen across a seemingly hand-painted ‘PARKING ONLY FOR MITCH FELTSCHEERS’ sign in Newtown, Sydney from tomorrow. It wasn’t me and it sounds super legit, best to obey.
