Like her recent displays of unparalleled perfection, holy gifts to wholly benefit the wellbeing of mankind and hero status weren’t enough to forevermore capture our trembling hearts,The Queen has played Santa to the unsuspecting people of Walmart: crashing the Teweksbury branch, performing Santa duties, buying her own album, dropping the mic and in a swift ‘Bey Out’, revellers quivered in her wake; declared 2013 Beymas and considered their presents redundant because, look, they can die in peace now.
The Christmas miracle unfolded thus: according to news.com.au, on Friday night, Beyoncé appeared at the Massachusetts Walmart to greet staff and shoppers, casually pushed an empty shopping trolley around, bought her album ‘Beyoncé’ – released on CD in the US at the end of last week – and reportedly gifted $37,500 worth of Walmart gift cards to customers in the form of $50 cards, in envelopes reading, “Happy Holidays from Beyonce.” I just can’t.
According to Walmart’s Twitter and per the video after the jump, Bey even coddled a toddler, and told her, “You are beautiful.” Irrationally jealous of that kid for life.
Thank you, Beysed Santa.
— Walmart (@Walmart) December 21, 2013
— Marissa Kerivan (@Mkerivan) December 21, 2013
Beyoncé spent $37,500 at Walmart handing out a $50 gift card to all customers who were in the store. pic.twitter.com/j5nBndVoIJ
— BEYONCÉ LEGION (@Bey_Legion) December 21, 2013
We can see your Halo, Bey.