Barnaby Joyce Is Fucking Stupid

Australian politics is always a bit of a shit show, but Barnaby Joyce has yet again managed to take it to the next level. The former Deputy PM decided it would be a great idea to use his infant son to push his anti-abortion stance in Parliament today.

Despite absolutely nobody asking for Barnaby’s opinion, he OBVIOUSLY took the time to craft a 90-second speech on why he’s an abortion expert. To make matters worse, this was a written, printed speech that he actually took the time to think about.

Basically, Joyce’s argument was that his infant son had rights before his umbilical cord was cut. So, he reckons your 8 week old foetus should too. But you shouldn’t get the rights to decide that. No rights for you.

“Inside the womb, Tom kicked, punched, grabbed his umbilical cord, felt pain, slept and dreamed – to say he didn’t have the rights of other human life is to say he must be sub-human,” Joyce said.

Ironically, Tom Joyce (Barnaby’s son) didn’t have the right to not be a prop in his dad’s parliamentary shit show today. But don’t worry, he’s got the rest of his life to be upset at his dad over that one.

“We had and have an absolute responsibility to Tom, but we never owned him,” he said.

Tom is apparently “more than merely a property right” until his dad needs to strengthen his argument at work.

“On the first of June, Vikki’s and my son Tom took his first breath,” Joyce addressed Federal Parliament today. Yep, Vikki is the staffer he had an affair with last year while being 2IC of the fucking country. But that’s another story.

90-seconds into his rant, his time was up and other members of Parliament started heckling him and asking him to sit down. Not bad advice, if you ask me.

Obviously, Aussies were quick to vent their frustrations on Twitter. It turns out most people aren’t a fan of Barnaby’s stance. Shocking.

https://twitter.com/anthhoss/status/1156809635908603904

Currently, NSW is the only state in the country that hasn’t decriminalised abortion. The maximum penalty currently stands at a whopping 10 years imprisonment for both doctors and patients.

The proposed bill to challenge this is backed by 15 state MPs from all sides of politics, but it won’t actually go up for debate until next week after conservative MPs protested it.

If passed, abortions would be available on request before the 22-week mark. After 22 weeks, patients would need the consent of two different doctors.

No politician should be able to control someone else’s bodily choices, least of all one who couldn’t even control his dick at the office.

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