The holiday season is fast approaching (hell, it’s literally this week), and we’re seeing astronomical COVID testing wait times every day, which seem to only grow worse as folks aim to get tested before they see their families. Some testing sites in Melbourne are reaching capacity before they even open for the day, while others in Sydney don’t return results for up to five days.
The growing demand for COVID testing is spiking as folks try to get the a-ok so they can travel interstate, while hundreds of others are named contacts who are required to get back a negative test to be free by Christmas.
hey so getting a covid test is a nightmare hey
— casey briggs (@CaseyBriggs) December 20, 2021
According to the ABC, NSW daily testing rates sat at around 60,000 per day in late November, but now we’re seeing upwards of 426,000. Just a slight increase, if my calculations are correct.
Meanwhile, in Victoria, testing sites like Melbourne Showgrounds are reportedly reaching capacity before they open at 7am, while other facilities such as the Albert Park facility frequently see 3.5 hour wait times.
Some places are even reporting 8hr wait times, with a 5 day wait for results, which is simply madness considering we’re at the end of our second year with this thing.
https://twitter.com/HannahD15/status/1473083838133723139?s=20
It would be great and reliable if we could test ourselves at this chaotic time with rapid antigen tests, but they aren’t free or easily accessible thanks to our bumbling head honcho Scott Morrison.
Really, our only option here if we need to get a test, is to endure batshit lines so that we can keep our friends and family safe before the festive season.
But with staff at these testing clinics being wildly unsupported, and a majority of testing sites closing due to extremely hot weather (or reasons even unknown to those working there), what is one to do?
this whole thing is chaos and support for those working in these testing clinics is shocking
— Michael Di Iorio (@michaeldiiorio1) December 21, 2021
So, because we’re all frustrated with the way that the Morrison government has handled this entire fiasco, I’ve collected some Twitter posts and memes channelling the general sense of frustration amongst Aussies.
Turned away from a COVID testing place this morning before 8:30 AM. Told too full & to come back @ 6 AM tomorrow. Concerning to say the least. Keep your masks on indoors please Sydney.
— Prof Deborah Marsh (@djmarsh24) December 20, 2021
Having 2-3 hour queues at testing centres at this stage of the pandemic seems sub-optimal to me
— Matt Cowgill (@MattCowgill) December 20, 2021
was just in line for 3 hours (literally 3 hours) to get a covid test at stanmore only to be turned away because they’re shutting the testing place down because of traffic…this a a nightmare ???
— vic zerbst (@VZerbst) December 20, 2021
Most of us have either been turned away from testing clinics, or have had to sit/stand in line for egregious amounts of time.
PEDESTRIAN.TV news reporter Aleksandra Bliszczyk attended a testing clinic in Melbourne on Monday that was supposed to have a wait time of approximately 120 minutes. She ended up waiting almost 3.5 hours, and was informed that there were only four staff members on duty for a queue of hundreds.
Why are you, as a COVID testing site asking about citizenship status?
— …K (@Shoobydoowoo) December 20, 2021
Has traffic management at PCR testing sites been shoved onto the pathology companies?
The site I just went to had ONE traffic officer managing a line of cars on the Princes Highway, crossing intersections, cars cutting in, no signage, people confused.
— JB (Parody of a functioning human) (@JB_AU) December 20, 2021
Soaliha Iqbal, news writer for PEDESTRIAN.TV, waited for 30 minutes at 11pm last night while attending a 24 hour testing site in Sydney. She was then told by staff that it would still be another two hours until she could be tested. She was encouraged to go home and then return around 1am, which she did. She still ended up waiting 30-40 minutes before being tested around 2am.
I am still enraged about this BC the audacity of assuming that everyone can drive to other testing sites to avoid the 3-7 hour WAIT TIMES?
— Wahaj (@wmeb__) December 20, 2021
But hey, at least some people like drag queen Etcetera Etcetera were able to witness a guy doing a handstand? We love that for them.
it’s been forty five minutes and he hasn’t managed to do one yet
— etcetera ɐɹǝʇǝɔʇǝ (@glamourbug) December 20, 2021
SA: if you come here, you can’t do anything until you get a test
also SA: you can’t get a test https://t.co/2X03shgiyK
— casey briggs (@CaseyBriggs) December 20, 2021
During a press conference today, NSW Health Minister Brad Hazzard announced that, unsurprisingly, testing sites across the country were facing “massive pressure”.
“Obviously they’re trying to access the various products that are required to do the testing but that’s not the sole issue,” he said.
“The issue is also that the staffing from not only doing the actual pathology testing, but also the administration making sure people are advised of their results is currently under massive pressure.”
Meanwhile, our Prime Minister would like to remind us that we need to take personal responsibility as we face this together. Okay now kids, hold hands, it’s kumbaya time. Omicron won’t be able to last long if we join forces and utilise the power of song.
Cases grow, the Prime MInister tells Australians to hold their nerve. Easy to say when you are first vaccinated and first to get a booster. On the Titanic, he would have been first on a lifeboat.
— Elaine McKay (@ElaineM11584892) December 20, 2021
No QR code’s, no masks, no contact tracing – for those of us unlucky enough to be in NSW this could be a full blown Covid disaster. Christmas, January and beyond may provide numerical proof of this idiocy. The 2 God lovers demand we take personal responsibility. DYFJ! Protect us.
— Paul McDermott (@YoungMasterPaul) December 20, 2021
“We’re not going back to lockdowns,” Morrison said during a conference on Tuesday.
“We’re going forward to live with this virus with common sense and responsibility.”
You know what I hate? .. I hate a prime minister who’s fully vaccinated with the booster shot telling millions of people who hasn’t been to live with the freaking virus.. get stuffed Prime Minister #auspol
— Politic@l Spinner (@lesstenny) December 21, 2021
Had my seventh negative Covid test this week.
One day soon it won’t be negative.
And when I test positive it won’t be because I didn’t take personal responsibility.
— Dr Lizzie Skinner 🩺🏳️🌈💉 (@drlizzieskinner) December 20, 2021
Natural when you have the reverent father Dominic Perrottet and our Prime Minister telling us to be ‘responsible’, you’re going to rile up a couple people.
Twitter has been a glorious place for some incredible takes, let me tell you.
Morrison just wants to get on with living his life. Your suffering is irrelevant to his life goals. So he tells you it’s your responsibility, nothing to do with him. The man is a psychopath, & I do not say that lightly.
— Dr Sheep Person Podge (@noplaceforsheep) December 20, 2021
Perrottet thinks that people should take personal responsibility over their precautions against Covid, but thinks the government should have control over women’s bodies.
— Emma (@emma__jayne14) December 20, 2021
At the very, very, very least wearing a mask to a shop or pub or anywhere is sending a message to hospo and retail staff that you respect them enough to not create extra stress for them in a nightmare period.
— Andrew P Street (@AndrewPStreet) December 21, 2021
But hey, not everything needs to be gloom and anger, so here are some glorious memes about covid waiting times/the brand new variant sweeping over our lives to brighten up your night.
covid strains frat boys in college
ruining my life draining me
emotionally
🤝
alpha delta omicron— abby govindan (@abbygov) December 20, 2021
covid ending things calming down
at work
🤝
not gonna happen— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) December 20, 2021
Half of my timeline has covid and the other half is getting engaged there’s no in between
— emily june (@emilyjune_) December 20, 2021
I have to admit, this next one stopped me in my tracks. Come to think of it, I don’t think I ever received a location ping in the last two years, and in the last couple of weeks alone I have about ten.
I have had more location contacts in the last two weeks than i have had in the last two years pic.twitter.com/Qw0qzosCIz
— emily (@emilytrmn) December 21, 2021
I can feel Omicron melting the NSW/VIC divisions away as we set our collective sights on bullying WA/SA
— Tom Studans (@maximumwelfare) December 21, 2021
https://twitter.com/TamePunk/status/1473081211627073536?s=20
https://twitter.com/nikitadumptruck/status/1472610077169303553?s=20
And to wrap up this entire yarn, here’s a lovely little look at whatever the fuck Morrison is doing at the moment.
Someone, please bring me the name of the person who wrote this new slogan for him, because it is truly tragic, and also very confusing???
https://twitter.com/thejimmalo/status/1473182040719646722?s=20
If you need me I’ll be in bed. Or in the 3.5-hour waiting line for my covid test. Whichever way the wind blows.
