Things didn’t quite go off as planned for beautiful, sparkling musical butterfly Mariah Carey in 2016.
First, she went through a high-profile separation with her fiance James Packer, with details of their intense pre-nup leaking to the media, and then her magnum opus, the reality series Mariah’s World, was panned by critics.
(On that last point, I maintain that Mariah’s World is actually a work of misunderstood comic genius – she happily took the piss out of her diamond-encrusted lifestyle, and shot scenes in character as her evil ’90s alter ego Bianca – but I digress).
Mariah’s year ended on another bum note – or actually, with little to no singing at all, as a New Year’s Eve performance in Times Square fizzled out when she and the backing track got irretrievably out of sync.
She had been heavily hyped as the star performer of Dick Clark’s Rockin Eve 2017, and was to perform ‘Emotions‘ and ‘We Belong Together‘, but appeared unable to hear her own songs.
“Well, Happy New Year,” she said, as technical difficulties got the better of her. “We can’t hear, but I’ll just go through the motions,” she added, later saying she’d at least tried to be a “good sport” about the whole thing.
Her dancers, including Tanaka – sweet, beautiful Tanaka – kept pushing through as Mariah checked her cleavage, flipped her hair and pondered which of her worthless peons she was going to fire for this immense fuck-up.
Watch it if your little heart can take it:
And now, for the grand finale, 2016 is taking out Mariah Carey live on stage pic.twitter.com/kfBJxXjepB
— The Ostrich (@ALostrich) January 1, 2017
Here’s to a better, brighter 2017 for us all, especially Mimi.
Source: News Corp.
Photo: Michael Stewart / Getty.