But with Big Day Out organisers vowing never to let the band perform at their festival again and folk dudes like Bon Iver hogging the Opera House , where oh where are everyone’s favourite rap-rockers going to play?
Let’s face it, these guys encapsulate the aggression, testosterone and terrible fashion choices of the ’90s better than anyone else around today. Their tunes are timeless – who doesn’t blast a little bit of ‘Break Stuff’ after a long day at work? It’s only fitting that Durst, Borland and those other guys whose names we don’t care to remember get the proper venue to accomodate their very specific nu-metal talents. Here’s our top five suggestions:
5. St John’s Cathedral, Brisbane: If it’s good enough for Seeker Lover Keeper girls, it’s good enough for the boys who did it all for the nookie. Besides, bassist Wes Borland famously quit the band to find Jesus, so he should be right at home here.
4. Bondi Beach, New Years Eve: Snoop Dogg is playing Shore Thing this year, and he did feature in one of their videos (see below, 0’23”), so it’s not like we haven’t seen this before. Plus they make Calvin Harris look like a wimp.
3. Mean Fiddler Pub, Rouse Hill. Frequently gracing the pointy end of the ‘Most Violent Pubs in NSW’ list, Mean Fiddler could be the ultimate host to the Bizkit’s preferred method of crowd involvement – the circle pit. It’s also more than likely that you can sing along to their sleeper hit, ‘Hot Dog’, which contains no less than 48 f-bombs, without being turfed by a bouncer like you would in the CBD.
2. Mt Panorama Circuit, Bathurst. Let’s be honest, we all love that ‘Rollin’ song and Bathurst 1000 attendees do love to get rowdy, degrade women and get loose to very offensive rock music. Throw in some scantily clad girls, XXXX beer and obnoxiously loud engine noises and the invite practically writes itself.
1. GoodGod Danceteria. Come on, they let Shaggy play there last year for a vodka promotion and he’s much less relevant. Intimate, exclusive and with a killer soundsystem. Besides, we’re pretty sure Levins and the crew from The Dip could cook up some Chocolate Starfish and/or Hotdog Flavoured Water.
We’d start a petition and all, but that would be stupid. Keep your eyes peeled, homies.