Voracious man-eater and King of the Kidz, Taylor Swift, and perpetually smug host vessel for a virulent strand of koala chlamydia, Harry Styles of noxious boy band One Direction, have made things Facebook official by appearing together in public over the weekend on an unchaperoned play date in New York’s Central Park. The two courted controversy by engaging in extremely risque PDA’s, like being within close proximity of one another and talking.
According to The Internet, this is conclusive proof that the two superstars are schtupping each other; almost certainly while on top of mounds of hard-earned babysitting cash and the Grammys Taylor keeps underneath her mattress, Princess and The Pea Style.
Apparently this is also the first time the once-rumoured couple, who were given the portmanteau Haylor, have been photographed in public together. Big deal, right?
Right. In other cool story bro news, One Direction have signed away their naming rights, likeness and souls with a licensing deal to release their first fragrance and ancillary products (probably shower gel, sanitary wipes and body glitter) in 2013.
According to WWD, the group (aka their exhaustive management team) have been working with Olivann Beauty for six months on the fragrance ahead of a predicted global launch in department stores located around the world in countries where the band are touring. This almost certainly means you can expect a Myer in-store appearance in Sydney come October next year when the band tours Australia during the HSC exam period. Ugh, it’s soo unfair Board of Studies/Mum.
Meanwhile in Canada, reigning tween fragrance mogul and hometown pariah, Justin Bieber, is probably crapping his awful harness harem pants at the news. Not only did Tay earn $2 million (USD) more than him last year ($57 million), that git Styles has now well and truly cut all his Canadian grass.
Photo by Christopher Polk, Theo Wargo via Getty, and also #HAYLOR on Instagram.
