Pink’s Inexplicable Deathgrip on Australia Confirmed In ARIA’s 2013 End Of Year Charts

Attention list lovers, ARIA have just released their official end of year charts chronicling last year’s best performing albums, musicians and singles, while also offering us a bird’s eye view at the listening and purchasing habits of the Australian music buying public. (Hint: someone out there still loves Pink more than you love anything). Here are five things we learned.  

The highest selling LP in the country last year was Pink’s ‘The Truth About Love’ which seems unremarkable when taken in isolation. But considering the album was released in 2012 and topped the exact same poll last year, we really have to ask ourselves, who the fuck is buying all these Pink albums? The dizzying heights of her commercial success in Australia is astounding. Pink is now the first person to ever top the ARIA end of year album charts in consecutive years with the exact same album and has now placed at number one or two for six out of the past seven years.
As we’ve previously noted: “Pink is a reasonably successful pop star who possesses the kind of pop punk edge that’s only slightly more believable than Avril Lavigne. She’s a worldwide success but in Australia she’s a revelation. In 2009 for example, Pink played 58 shows in Australia. To put that in perspective Pink played 11 dates in the UK and made $58 million on her entire European tour. In a country with a population of around 21 million people, Pink made $70 million and played to approximately 660,000 people.”

Yep. She should name her next kid Australia because that’s who’s paying for their college education.   

He featured on two songs in the top ten (see: Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” and Daft Punk’s “Get Lucky”) cementing ‘feat. Pharrell’ as the music biz equivalent of ‘starring Leonardo DiCaprio’.   

The singer’s ‘Roar’ (pronounced RAAAAAWWWWRR) spent nine weeks at No. 1, good for the longest chart-topping run of the year and a total of 21 weeks in the top 10. Perry’s album, ‘Prism’, sold an impressive 179,000 copies in ten weeks, second only to Pink and the voodoo pact she signed with satan.
Debut album “Pure Heroine” came it at ninth on the album charts, buoyed largely by the popularity of lead single “Royals” which placed fifth in the single charts and first on the inaugural ARIA streaming charts. Amen. 
Thirteen Australian artists were included in the ARIA Top 100 Singles Chart, two more than the previous year, with Vance Joy topping all with ‘Riptide’ at 12, followed by Birds Of Tokyo with ‘Lanterns’ at 27, and Matt Corby’s ‘Resolution’ at 39. In the albums, there were 27 local releases charting in the top 100, the exact same as last year. The highest ranked being Flume’s self-titled debut at 11, followed by The 12th Man’s comedy album ‘Willy Nilly – The 12th Man’s Biggest Hits’ at 15, and Human Nature’s ‘The Christmas Album’ at 16.

That’s actually kind of depressing now that we think about it. 

Check out the various top tens below…  

Top 10 Singles of 2013  

1. Katy Perry ‘Roar’ 
2. Robin Thicke Feat. T.I. & Pharrell ‘Blurred Lines’ 
3. Passenger ‘Let Her Go’ 
4. Avicii ‘Wake Me Up’ 
5. Lorde ‘Royals’ 
6. P!nk Feat. Nate Ruess ‘Just Give Me A Reason’ 
7. Daft Punk Feat. Pharrell Williams ‘Get Lucky’ 
8. OneRepublic ‘Counting Stars’ 
9. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis Feat. Ray Dalton ‘Can’t Hold Us’ 
10. James Arthur ‘Impossible’
Top 10 Albums of 2013 
1. P!nk ‘The Truth About Love’  
2. Katy Perry ‘Prism’ 
3. Bruno Mars ‘Unorthodox Jukebox’ 
4. Michael Buble ‘To Be Loved’ 
5. Daft Punk ‘Random Access Memories’ 
6. One Direction ‘Midnight Memories’ 
7.Michael Buble ‘Christmas’ 
8. Eminem ‘The Marshall Mathers LP2’ 
9. Lorde ‘Pure Heroine’ 
10. Passenger ‘All The Little Lights’
Top 10 Streaming Tracks of 2013 
1. Lorde ‘Royals’ 
2. Avicii ‘Wake Me Up’ 
3. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis Feat. Ray Dalton ‘Can’t Hold Us’ 
4. Passenger ‘Let Her Go’ 
5. Imagine Dragons ‘Radioactive’ 
6.  Robin Thicke Feat. T.I. & Pharrell ‘Blurred Lines’ 
7. OneRepublic ‘Counting Stars’ 
8. Daft Punk Feat. Pharrell Williams ‘Get Lucky’ 
9. Flume ‘Holdin On’ 
10. Vance Joy ‘Riptide’