Lady Gaga Will Be The First Pop Star To Perform Sans Pants In Space

In the literal embodiment of the ridiculous lyrics (“garden panty”) comprising her most recent single from ARTPOP, ‘Venus’, Lady Gaga will become the first pop star to perform in space in early 2015 as part of Virgin Galactic’s elaborate Gravity parody. 
According to Us Weekly, Gags has been chosen to perform a single song during the Zero G Colony musical festival taking place at Spaceport America in New Mexico. A. Source has intimated that the feat itself – her most elaborate aping of Bowie yet – requires “a month of vocal training because of the atmosphere” and is planned to take place on the third day of the festival at dawn, approximately six months after the first Virgin Galactic commercial flight ejects Justin Bieber at some point – any point, please – during the first chartered expedition, while Kate Winslet-Rocknroll holds on to her husband Ned Rocknroll for dear life. That’s a real sentence. 
The Source adds, rather redundantly, that the historic performance will be “like nothing the world has seen before” and that “Gaga has taken out a ridiculous life insurance policy”, probably at the behest of Sandy Bullock.