The Sims 4 is that place we all go to make our wildest fantasies and craziest versions of life a living reality — from insane deaths to discovering new kinks. But you know what they say: life can often be stranger than fiction.
This is why EA Games has helped Aussie indie band, Cub Sport, to use the game as a way to bring the retelling of their wildest touring story to light.
Let me (slash, actually Cub Sport because I am but a mere scribe) tell unto you a tale of utmost woe. Yes, it is a tale of food poisoning.
Now, food poisoning is a real bummer at the best of times. So you can only imagine the horror of solid food poisoning after a night out at Berlin’s Berghain club when you’re on tour and need to travel to your next gig — where yes, you will have to actually PERFORM like the rock god you are. That’s a huge no from me. Maybe this is the real reason why the band I formed in high school never made it out of the garage?
Think that’s bad? It gets worse. Imagine being kicked out of your own gig? That’s exactly what happened to a 17-year-old SYCCO when there was a little confusion from a club manager around underage drinking (don’t worry, nothing illegal actually happened) and her Mum had to swoop in and save the day.
And, THEN, we have a lost nail at the absolute worst of times. Picture this: you’re about to win an Aria, you’re all dolled up and your long nails are looking fierce. Then BOOM, one of those bad bois pops right off, leaving your finger naked to collect your heavy-arse trophy. That’s exactly what went down for Kaiit.
The Sims recreations don’t end there – no siree Bob. Aussie singer-songwriter Mia Rodriguez hopped on to outline her absolute dream gig, which of course has Doja Cat, Lil Nas X and a tonne of high-profile artists in the crowd, as well as a random monster truck as a stage prop.
It truly does look like the gig to end all gigs, I’ll give her that.
Anyway, watch above for the full story of sweating bullets, hospital beds, being booted out of your own gig and losing a nail at the worst of times. At least The Sims characters make it less painful to endure.
Honestly, it’s all so satisfying I almost couldn’t take another sip, and yet I absolutely will. Excuse me while I go play with life in The Sims for the rest of the day.
