CONTENT WARNING: This article discusses sexual assault & harassment. If you would like to talk to a counsellor about rape, sexual assault or domestic violence, give the people over at 1800 RESPECT a call on 1800 737 732.
The rise of combatting harassment and unwanted attention at live gigs is developing throughout Australia and overseas – we’ve had festivals set up hotlines, and folks like Camp Cope, Luca Brasi, Frenzal Rhomb, Chris Farren and Triple J’s Dom Alessio come together to create the #ItTakesOne campaign.
Each of these initiatives have been created to put an end to sexual harassment at shows, and promote a safe and inclusive environment for everyone to enjoy live entertainment without feeling unsafe or uncomfortable.
But it seems that some people just haven’t gotten the pretty fuckin’ clear memo, and Brendan Ekstrom from Circa Survive recently had to leave the stage mid-set to address a situation that he witnessed unfolding in the crowd.
The band is currently on tour in the United States with AFI and Citizen, and at their St. Louis show on July 21, Brendan disappeared from the stage and returned some time later.
Brendan took to Twitter to explain that in 20 years of touring and playing shows, he’s never had to leave the stage in the middle of a gig, but couldn’t continue playing without stepping in to the obvious incident that he was watching from the stage.
Quick note to those who were at the show last night. I’ve been doing this for 20 years and I’ve never walked of stage during a song before.
— Brendan ekstrom (@Brendanekstrom) July 22, 2017
His thread follows on to explain what he saw from stage, and what happened when he entered the crowd with security to try and fix the situation.
“For almost a whole song I watched a guy stand a row behind a girl flirting and then trying to kiss her. It was hard to tell what was really happening. At times she seemed ok with his advances but after the second time of watching her push his face and hands away and try to turn back to watch the show I asked the security guard to go check on them. He couldn’t see what I was pointing to and it was still happening. I left the stage and walked straight for them, my mind an emotional blur. Security followed me,” Brendon said.“The man seemed dumbfounded when I showed up as if nothing was wrong. I don’t know what happened after. I went back to stage to finish the show. Security took it from there. I didn’t see them again after that. Maybe they were removed or just moved. Maybe they were in a relationship. Maybe they weren’t. Regardless what I saw from stage was disturbing to me and completely removed me from the mindset I need to be on stage. It wasn’t cute. It was alarming,”“I’m almost forty and flirting doesn’t look like that. Maybe It’s that I have a daughter or that I’m older. I really don’t know but it made me furious to watch a girl forcibly remove someone’s hands from her body multiple times,”“I still don’t feel great about how I handled this situation. I borderline blacked out in some weird rage mode. It makes me nervous to think about how I would handle situations like this in the future especially if it was with someone I knew or cared about especially if it is my daughter. I don’t really know what to say about it all,”“I’m sorry to my band for not communicating the situation better and leaving them standing on stage confused. And I’m sorry to fans who were equally confused and saw a bit of an unusual show.”
When someone that is playing a set has to take initiative and step down into the crowd to call you out on your shitty behaviour towards others, it’s time to take a good hard look at yourself.
Jesus Christ, people. Respect other peoples’ personal space. Keep your hands to yourself. It truly isn’t that fuckin’ hard.
Photo: Instagram / @circasurvive.
