Brissy Comic Gifts Adele (And You) Some Insider Tips For A BNExcellent Stay

Rumour has it (sorry) that world’s brightest star and foulest-mouthed English rose Adele is about to touch down in Brisbane for two sold-out performances at sport stadium The Gabba. Local comedian and TV host Mel Buttle has taken it upon herself to provide the multi-award winning singer with a series of tips on making the most of this euphoric Queensland city. 

Of course, they work just as well for people who aren’t bajillionaire superstars, so if you’re planning a trip up north, Buttle’s got your back:

Also, Adele, eat before, I know you’ll be nervous, but everything is shut at 9pm, so grab a bite prior or you’ll starve.

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(Thanks for pointing that out, Mel – this city does love a septuagenarianly early night.)

Also, Adele, Red Rooster have a two for $10 deal on Rooster Rolls, so that could be a good cheap lunch for you and one of the crew?

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(She’s really selling it!)

Also, Adele, for a cheap dinner wait til Coles reduce the chooks, get a 1/2 chook, and bag of salad that’s discounted, easy dinner.

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(Can’t argue with value).

Also, Adele, don’t go to Underwater World, big queues, you can’t get close to the glass for a good look, and the sharks are actually tiny.

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(Alright, this one’s just not true – Underwater World is a treasure.)

Also Adele, sometimes my dog dreams with her eyes open, twitching, legs running, it’s full on to see, if you get the chance?

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(That’s… nice, Mel…)

Also Adele, if you want to write off a car that you’re sick of, park it at Toombul outside, that car park always floods when it rains.

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(We’re in Deep Local territory now.)

Also Adele, the Go Between Bridge is a rip off, save your $, honestly not worth it. If you forget to pay there’s a $17 admin fee.

— Mel Buttle (@MelindaButtle) March 3, 2017

(This one should be on a flyer handed out to everyone at the airport, quite frankly.)

There you have it: Buttle’s Unabridged Guide to Brisbane for Visiting Superstars. If someone could pass it along to Adele, that would be wonderful. Otherwise, see you (through my tears) on Saturday at The Gabba.