Last night, comedian Amy Schumer gave a ridiculously, wonderfully awesome speech about body image and confidence, holding forth on the subject of an extremely awkward sexual encounter in college, and the lessons it taught her later in life. Schumer was speaking at the Gloria Awards and Gala, hosted by the Ms. Foundation, an organization devoted to securing rights, equality and justice for women. She was joined by the likes of Gabourey Sidibe and Chelsea Handler, but her speech won the most hearts of the night.
She went on to describe a horrible, drunken booty call with an older boy named Matt, who played the Braveheart soundtrack during sex, and then fell asleep halfway through. At the time, she figured he was the best she could do. “He smelled like skunk microwaved with cheeseburgers, which I planned on finding and eating in the bathroom, as soon as he was asleep,” she said. “We tried kissing … I felt like I was being tongued by someone who had just been given novocaine. I felt faceless, and nameless.”
Schumer went on to say that she emerged from this horribly awkward encounter as her old, confident self again. “I was looking down at myself from the ceiling fan,” she said. “What happened to this girl? How did she get here? I felt the fan on my skin and I went, “Oh, wait! I am this girl! We got to get me out of here!” I became my own fairy godmother.” She later added “I never heard from Matt again, but felt only grateful for being introduced to my new self, a girl who got her value from within her.”
“Now I feel strong and beautiful,” she said. “I walk proudly down the streets of Manhattan. The people I love, love me. I make the funniest people in the country laugh, and they are my friends. I am a great friend and an even better sister. I have fought my way through harsh criticism and death threats for speaking my mind. I am alive, like the strong women in this room before me.”
You can read the whole text of her speech here, and then when you’re done, you might consider binging on Inside Amy Schumer clips as I’m just about to do.
Picture: Astrid Stawiarz via Getty Images
