Wanna know how you know when the pandemic has fully changed life as we know it? When house listings include things that never would have existed before 2020. The latest instance of this comes to us in the floor plan of a new house in NSW, which includes something called a “Zoom Zone”.

It was brought to my attention by a tweet from Erin Riley, who posted up the house’s online flyer and called the concept of a Zoom Zone “horrifying”.

I can’t quite decide whether this is some real marketing ingenuity or just deeply dystopian. It’s either a master stroke from the agents, or a new trend that should make me feel uneasy in the deepest part of my soul.

The house, located in Lochinvar in the Hunter Valley, looks pretty nice and very modern – double storey, four bedrooms, three loungerooms, open plan kitchen and dining, three toots. I’d live there in a heartbeat, to be honest.

Curiously, there’s a spot on the floor plan featuring a cupboard, desk and chair. The Zoom Zone. The ZOOM ZONE. The zone where you do your Zoom calls.

new house floorplan zoom zone
Z O O M  Z O N E.

Zoom Zone. I just can’t get my head around the fact that real estates are now promoting offices and study spaces as a zone to do video calls. Does Zoom know about this? Or are we now at a point in history where ‘Zoom’ is a verb, much like how Google was adopted as a verb for searching something online?

Either way, I’m equal parts on board and very much not on board for the Zoom Zone. Unless it was a room filled with greyhounds doing zoomies. I could absolutely get behind that – a Zoomies Zone where a bunch of gangly dogs are just hooning around.

Fuck the Zoom Zone, give me the excited puppies doing zoomies in a room. Sure beats working from home.

Image: realestate.com.au