If there is one consistent thing we can expect from the Trump administration – aside from the inexorable and highly depressing backslide into fascist nationalism – it is Melania Trump‘s steadfast commitment to designing and executing supremely haunted White House Christmas displays. While the rest of the world has accepted the holiday as a Christian or, at a pinch, highly commercialised secular tradition, Melania understands that Christmas absolutely thrums with ancient, evil pagan energy. And she brings it!
You might recall last year’s display, which didn’t evoke ‘Christmas’ so much as ‘eldritch ritual foretold in Sumerian prophecy to call forth a powerful demon’:
I scrolled by this photo of actual White House holiday decorations four times before I realized it was not from a production of Macbeth pic.twitter.com/yUOVYsCAuD
— Joseph Scrimshaw (@JosephScrimshaw) November 27, 2017
You can just imagine some kind of high priest shrouded in black robes walking down that evil-ass hallway towards a sacrificial altar of some description. Very powerful vibes.
Melania’s 2018 decorations are also very much on theme. This year’s angle? Well, I have no way of describing it other than ‘buckets of human blood’:
— Melania Trump (@FLOTUS) November 26, 2018
This is very much a game of ‘one of these is not like the other’. Three of those photos are pretty basic ‘Hamptons Mom Does Luxe Christmas’, and one of them is ‘You Will Know Me, Destroyer Of Worlds, By The Trail Of Dead’:
This looks like a shot Stanley Kubrick cut from the The Shining for being “a bit much”. It looks like a scene from an ill-advised ‘holiday-themed’ TV movie sequel to The Omen. Quite frankly, it looks like dogshit.
Keen for 2019!Image: Getty Images