Let me tell you about the day I got a Dyson vacuum – aka the day my life changed forever.
Previously, I was a mere lost soul. Cast asunder. Adrift in an endless sea dragging a heavy-ass regular vacuum along behind me. But then the Dyson arrived, and ye I saweth the light.
This magical blue-and-grey stick has delivered me from evil (my shitty old vacuum) and has transported me t’wards Valhalla (a world where my overall vacuuming time is cut in half).
It’s the grand irony of the chore itself that vacuuming absolutely sucks. But, unequivocally, it sucks infinitely less when performed with the magical Dyson V7; a machine apparently designed by God himself to rid my house of the gargantuan amount of hair my cat seemingly expels from her body at will.
And the good news for those of you who still have to get shin-deep in tumbleweeds just to traverse your own hallway, is that the mythical Dyson V7 is going for insanely cheap right now thanks to the mighty overlords of savings, Catch.
The mythical V7 – both the normal version and its slightly beefed-up Animal compatriot – are currently going dirt cheap as part of Catch’s on-going Click Frenzy hullabaloo.
The two versions of the cordless vac – both of which come with the extremely-worth-just-fanging-a-screw-in-the-wall-who-gives-a-shit-about-the-landlord wall mount – are currently up for grabs at an eye-watering $200 and $250 below RRP. Which is a pretty bloody solid deal no matter which way you look at it.
I genuinely cannot express to you how much I love this vacuum. I knew not the possibility of adoring a machine so ardently. It sits suspended on my kitchen hallway wall, patiently awaiting duty’s call. And at that point I reef it down and it just absolutely blunderbusses the piss out of my carpets. All fur and dust yeeted up in there. Clean as a fwhistle.
I am not getting paid to tell you this – although if they wish to, my favour is curryable – but this vacuum is a boneafide gamechanger.
Do yourself one hell of a favour.