Who Will Be on the Aussie ‘I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out Of Here’?

File this one under ‘Really Excellent Ideas’, sub-section ‘What Could Possibly Go Wrong?’

In an attempt to turn around its flagging fortunes – and perhaps prove to the world that our C and D-list celebrities are way worse than everyone else’s – Network Ten have officially announced that they will be making an Aussie version of the reality show I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out Of Here!

The series originated in the U.K. 12 years ago, and is still a massive success there. The last season drew in an average of just over 10 million viewers, and if the Aussie version could pull even 1/10th of that, it would be a smash for Ten.
Reality Ravings report that the series will take a cluster of “Australian celebrities” – a broad ambit that could potentially include anybody and anything from Kyle Sandilands to The Gobbledok – and drop them into a remote location in Africa.
Once there, contestants will be forced to forage for food and compete in challenges, as we all agree to cross our fingers and participate in the collective delusion that they are actually roughing it, and there aren’t personal assistants, hot meals and luxury digs right there with them.
The series will launch next year, and depending on the talent – a word used loosely – that Ten  choose, it could be your go-to hatewatching experience of 2015. Here are a few of our nominations for what would surely be a compelling season of TV:
Kyle Sandilands: ‘Controversial’ media figure, total lack of fucks-giver.
Eso from Bliss ‘n Eso: Could be part of the noted misogynist’s ‘redemption’ narrative.
Pauline Hanson: Guaranteed generator of outraged Fairfax media coverage.
Mike Carlton: Guaranteed generator of outraged News Limited media coverage.
Pauline Pantsdown: How amazing would a showdown featuring the two Paulines be?
Gina Liano: The bestest of the Real Housewives, would keep the others in line.
Todd Carney: You know he’d be good at staying hydrated in the wilderness.
Frances Abbott: Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease.
Dannii Minogue: The Minogue you call when Kylie’s people hang up on you.
Helen Razer: Hilarious truth bomb-dropper, tied with Kyle Sandilands for lack of fucks given.
Let’s show the world what we’ve got. AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE.
Photo: Sergio Dionisio via Getty Images