
John Oliver knows this all too well. Even though the nation’s newest ranter-in-chief is actually off this week (we can only assume Last Week Tonight will be too busy getting shitfaced after their inaugural Emmy win), he still made time to deliver a web-exclusive missive on those feathery fucks.
“To me, every single bird is just a shitty sequel to the dinosaurs, and we’d be better off without you,” Oliver exclaims, his spit practically slapping against the camera lens.
And woe betide the ostriches of the world. Oliver even manages to coin a new sweary verb when describing ’em, as he says “you look like a giant ball of lint trying to upshit out a huge leathery snake.”
It’s the biggest roast of birds we’ve seen this side of the Coles rotisserie. Unexpected? Yes. Unappreciated? No. Watch: