Are we really going to sit here and do this, Australia? OK we’re actually going sit here and do this. Because for a while there I thought we were going to sit here and not do this. But no, apparently we can’t not do this. OK then. Days after A Current Affair aired an interview with bully victim turned internet hero Casey Heynes, Today Tonight counter with an exclusive interview with the person he body slammed – aggressor turned limping person, Richard Gale. Proving there are two sides to every story one of which will appear far less believable than the other, Richard appeared in a Seven exclusive last night to plead his innocence and express regret in the most non-committal way possible.

For one, Gale says his actions were warranted because Heynes instigated the brawl in the first place. In an altercation not seen on camera or believed by anyone, Gayle claims Heynes told him “get to class you idiot” before throwing the first punch. Between requisite waterworks from both Richard and his father (who tutors his son on believable remorse mid-interview) it is finally revealed that the bully himself has long been the victim of bullying. At which point the interviewer literally tries to teach Gale the meaning of irony and you kind of have to stop watching.