It should go without saying if you consider the inherent SPOILER ALERT of the above title, but what follows is rife with basic plot spoilers for the J.J. Abrams-helmed seventh instalment in the Star Wars franchise – that’s according to Badass Digest, who have reportedly obtained the typically farfetched premise of Episode VII.
That hand then casually makes its way down onto a desert planet, where it’s discovered by our new heroes – newcomer Daisy Ridley and Attack The Block’s John Boyega, who, like Mark Hamill, is playing someone trying to change his life. Recognising the sabre as a Jedi relic, they embark on an off-world quest to return it to its owner. On their way, they meet a geriatric Han Solo and Chewbacca, who are no longer piloting the Millennium Falcon but recognise the light sabre as Luke’s, who they haven’t seen in the thirty years since Return of the Jedi.