There’s A High Chance Matty J & His Chosen One Goofed & Exposed Themselves

Lovers of reality TV are gluttons for punishment: they scream bloody murder when someone shares a ~spoiler~, but can’t resist potentially ruining their own lives by clicking on said spoiler.
Well, we’re here today with what could be the mother of all spoilers if you’re a fan of this season’s ‘The Bachelor’, starring hunky reject Matty J and his washboard abs.
Rumours are rife that the Sydney native has dun goofed and let slip the winner of his heart before the third episode has even aired, after he posted a photo of him engaged in a very specific winter activity on the exact same day as… LAURA BYRNE.
AKA the jewellery designer he’s been taken with since she he forced her to gift him a ring she made. AKA Georgia Love‘s twin, as new villain Jennifer Hawke rightly pointed out (several times).
sorry i’m not georgia 🙁
The staunch favourite to take out the season (quite literally: Sportsbet has her at $2), 30-year-old Laura just *happened* to be at the snow on the same day as Matty J. The snow, people. On. The. Same. Bloody Day.
Sure, she’s in Queenstown, New Zealand with friends and Matty J tagged his location as Perisher Valley, but that could easily be a ruse. And a not-very-good one.
EXHIBIT A: 

Sure it may not be as beautiful as the alps in Europe, lift passes are twice the price and there’s not as much snow but it was still awesome to be back on the slopes in Aus ??

A post shared by Matty J (@matthewdavidjohnson) on


EXHIBIT B: 

Time to eat sh*t and run into trees…. yew #ihavenoideawhatiamdoing @lelubee @mikedg

A post shared by Laura Byrne ?? (@ladyandacat) on

“Totes Gnarly dude…..totes” ???#everythinghurts #noseriouslyeverythinghurts #mypoorbutt

A post shared by Laura Byrne ?? (@ladyandacat) on


I don’t need to tell any of you what this means: Laura wins ‘The Bachelor’ 2K17.

This is a good thing insofar as she seems like a genuinely lovely person… but EIGHT FUCKING WEEKS BEFORE THE FINALE?!

Missed last night’s ep? DW. Watch our recap instead:

Photo: Instagram / @matthewdavidjohnson. 

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