After Victorian Premier Dan Andrews flagged the potential for even stricter conditions to be enforced, talk began to circulate around the web regarding a possible stage 4 lockdown for Melbourne, similar to that of New Zealand’s.
“Stage 4” has since been trending on Australian Twitter, and it seems as though we’ve been left with the same questions: What exactly is stage 4, and what restrictions would that entail? Will it even happen? When could it happen? Who knows? Not the MPs, apparently…
Hey @DanielAndrewsMP can you please either confirm or deny the rumour that is going around that we are going into Stage 4 tomorrow night… my phone & emails are going off!!! I’m saying not that I have heard…. #springst
— Georgie Crozier MP (@georgiecrozier) July 14, 2020
At this stage, times seem pretty dire. And how do we deal with dire times? Through humour, of course.
As is the case with most things in 2020, the stage 4 lockdown has already been memified (real word) by the trusty cybersphere, with folk trying to decipher what this next stage of restrictions entails, and how it will impact the lives of Melburnians. So, without further ado, check out some of the best reactions to a potential stage 4 lockdown below. (Because if we don’t laugh, we’ll cry.)
Stage 4 restrictions mean no take away coffee. In Melbourne. There’ll be people coming up to you on your walk, whispering “what do you need? Ethiopian single origin? Arabica? If you give me ten minutes, I’ve got a guy who does cold brew…”
— adam rozenbachs (@arozenbachs) July 14, 2020
Stage 4 is you’re allowed outside but you have to wear a zorb ball pic.twitter.com/WBSsFZUsy5
— Tyson Whelan (@tyson_whelan) July 14, 2020
https://twitter.com/OKudelka/status/1282890210510921728
https://twitter.com/captainfaq/status/1282867828513665024
Footage of me leaving my house after Stage 4 restrictions are lifted and I forget how to converse with humans pic.twitter.com/wpxv0cI3Ke
— jordan (@JRDNM0) July 14, 2020
https://twitter.com/jonkudelka/status/1282984178762395653
You have to register your designated leg online before leaving the house. On the spot fines apply for breaches.
— jon “airships” kudelka (@jonkudelka) July 14, 2020
Will Dan Murphys be open in stage 4?
— Harley (@hdfield7) July 14, 2020
For now, while we wait for further answers, I suggest we all listen to Katy Perry’s Simlish version of “Last Friday Night” on repeat as a form of catharsis. (Simlish has that effect on people.)
In all seriousness, though, given that Andrews has explicitly mentioned “stage 4” at yesterday’s press briefing, here’s an explainer on how stage 4 restrictions in Melbourne will differ to stage 3.
