Alright, alright, get your butt in here, it’s time we spoke about something near and dear to my heart. Spy Kids. It’s the early 2000’s film of your childhood that never gets enough praise, and I’d like to shine some light on my favourite part of the films.

Yes, you may already know that the movies were fkn brilliant, especially the second one with the Emily Osment helicopter ponytails and Steve Buscemi questioning why God is afraid of all of us, but I’m not here to talk about any of that.

I’m here to talk about Antonio Banderas and Carla Gugino, who play the parents in the films, but more specifically, the parents who FUCK.

spy kids
they didn’t need to be so horny, but alas…

The amount of iridescent hotness that oozes from these two actors every time they’re on screen is quite frankly unfair, especially considering the fact that these movies were aimed at children. To be honest, I used to think I was bisexual because of this movie, until I realised I was just straight-up gay.

However, even these days I look back at Banderas, Gugino and their on-screen chemistry and think… you know what… maybe I do swing both ways. The heat from these two is palpable. Undeniable. They’re so hot together, and for what? To what end? What did they gain from being a gorgeous, visibly flirtatious couple in a kids movie about spies?

spy kids
this is the dream.

I mean, let me pause for a second and remind you that the first Spy Kids film had an entire 3-minute segment dedicated to how Gugino and Banderas’ characters met. It’s steamy, it’s passionate, and it’s full of long, intense stares and high-octane action.

As a child, I always wished I would have a love story similar to this. It fkn slaps.

Half the time the duo were either off-screen or tied up in some evil geniuses lair, but that didn’t stop them from being the human definition of attractiveness.

And then they’d meet up with their kids after a long period of being separated from them and continue to prove why they’re the best parents ever. Hot people who are great at parenting? Is there anything they can’t do?

spy kids
*whispers in horny*

Oh yeah, the pair are also spies who gave up their entire careers for the safety of their kids. Iconic. Icon behaviour.

spy kids
every queer person today dresses like one of these characters.

So yeah, this is your reminder to watch the Spy Kids series again just to soak up Carla Gugino and Antonio Banderas at their peak.

You can catch all movies in the Spy Kids series on Stan right fkn now. Do it. Embrace the hotness.