In a move grossly uncharacteristic of Hollywood it has been announced that a sequel, which in no way needs to be made, is on the way.
Much like the horrifying slight against all that is good and decent in the world, otherwise known as Mean Girls 2 [spits], the sequel to the last movie you ever expected to get a sequel is set to walk amongst us.
The production company responsible for Spring Breakers, Wild Bunch, has confirmed that the terribly titled ‘Spring Breakers: The Second Coming‘ is on its way; a film “in which the Spring Breakers do battle with an extreme militant Christian sect that attempts to convert them.”
But, perhaps we’re being unfair…
Sprang Brayk 4ever II is to be written by acclaimed playwright/novelist/Scotsman Irvine Welsh and directed by legendary music video director/Scandi Jonas Åkerlund.
So, there’s that. Also, to reiterate:
Now to play something sweet and uplifting. “This one’s by a little known pop singer by the name of miss Britney Spears. One of the greatest pop singers of all-time, and an angel if there ever was one on this earth”: