Pizza Hut Ups Its Game, Puts Tiny Hot Dogs Into Places You Didn’t Know Were Places

Pizza Hut‘s only regret is that it has but no fucks to give.
Not to be deterred by the Australian arm of its operations drawing the line in the sand with its only-attractive-on-a-post-pub-Sunday Meat Pie Crust pizza – in which tiny pies were shoved unmercifully into the crust of an ordinary pizza because sweating and palpitations are just internal body mods – the US has thrown the gauntlet back down in unleashing the Hot Dog Pizza unto the unsuspecting world.
Frankensteining two Australian variations together – the aforementioned artery-fucking Pie Crust, and the pre-existing rolled Hot Dog Crust – our mates from across the Pacific have pulled together a pizza lined with a raft of mini Hot Dog Bites; guarding the pizza’s perimeters like some sort of morbid, mystery meat Cerberus.
The new hellish creation apparently comes in two variations: Plain, and seedy. Which is precisely the state of dress and physical health you’d need to be in before tackling this beast.
The pizzas will come with a side of mustard for which to do the dipping, and will be available in the US from June 18th, if you just so happen to be swinging o’er the Land of the Free in the next few weeks.
Added bonus! As well as clogging your vital organs and forcing you to question your life choices, the pizza provides ample fodder for classic prop comedy.
Now that’s entertainment!
Photo via Twitter.