I love Paris Hilton. Not in a ‘I want to buy a Von Dutch trucker hap’ kind of way, or even in an ‘I endorse anyone who lives in a museum of themselves’ kind of way, but in because in the year 2017 she remains a perfect embodiment of early noughties culture. She’s like 2003 preserved in formaldehyde.

In a provocatively titled piece in W Magazine (‘Paris Hilton Invented Everything You’re Doing In 2017, And She Knows It’), Hilton claims to have invented the modern day role of ‘influencer’ – and look, she’s not wrong. The Kardashians may have perfected the fame-for-cash game, but Paris launched it. As she herself would say, “That’s hot.™” (We’re not kidding. “That’s hot” is trademarked.)

She also boldly claims to have invented the selfie.

“If a beeper had a camera, I would have taken a selfie with it,” she says, agreeing that she was the art form’s true founder. “I think I have a selfie from when I was a little kid, like on a disposable camera.”

Obviously, Paris brought the selfie to the mainstream during an episode of ‘The OC‘ in 2004, playing ‘Kate‘, a real estate heiress who smooches Seth Cohen.

Paris Hilton Boldly Claims To Have Invented 2017’s Fav Art Form, The Selfie

But the inventor? Um, try again, sweetie.

The interview – which is stuffed full of incredible details like the fact that Paris owns five phones and that her five dogs reside in a two-story poolside villa – also includes a kinder Paris in regards the whole Kardashian-Jenner lot than we’ve seen in the past.

Paris Hilton Boldly Claims To Have Invented 2017’s Fav Art Form, The Selfie

“I’ve known the family my whole life,” she said. “They are all intelligent, beautiful business women and I’m proud of them and the brand they’ve built.”

She also praises Kendall Jenner‘s recent birthday outfit (not to be confused with ‘birthday suit’), which was a direct reference to an iconic Paris look for her own 21st birthday. Can we just pause for a second to appreciate the brazenness of Kendall inviting Paris to her birthday party, recreating her look, and then NOT TELLING HER UNTIL DIRECTLY QUESTIONED ABOUT IT?

vintage Paris Hilton vibes

A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on

Paris Hilton Boldly Claims To Have Invented 2017’s Fav Art Form, The Selfie

Photo: Dave Benett / Getty.

Paris, however, took it as the ultimate compliment. “Young people now see what people wore before and want to bring it back,” she said.

And by the way, if you haven’t seen Sofia Coppola‘s 2013 film ‘The Bling Ring‘, then allow W to paint a portrait of the socialite’s home.

“Take a few steps further inside and it is apparent that every surface in Hilton’s house is covered with images of herself. In the living room, a photo in a bedazzled frame featuring Nancy Regan holding her as a baby; in the dining room, a giant cardboard cutout; in the “club” room, a photo of her and Michael Jackson in a gentle embrace; and on the way to the kitchen, an enormous portrait made up of hundreds of smaller portraits. But perhaps most jarring are the framed cell phone mirror selfies, one of which reflects infinitely in a guest bathroom lined with floor-to-ceiling mirrors.”

Yes. In Paris Hilton’s world, the greatest artwork is her own damn face.

Read the full interview HERE.

Photo: GONZALO / Bauer-Griffin / Getty.