In the halcyon days of fashion blogs and bloggers, before Instagram reigned supreme and having a .tumblr or .wordpress was the height of internet presence, before anyone with an eye for memes or a cute as shit dog could become internet famous, two Australian fashion bloggers reined supreme: Gary Pepper Girl (Nicole Warne) and Tuula Vintage (Jessica Stein).
This article is about the latter.
I admit, it’s been many years since I followed Tuula Vintage, and perusing her Instagram now it is clear to me that this is Fashion Blogger Ground Zero. How many others have attempted to copy her polaroid aesthetic of floaty dresses, brown skin, and European charm? You can try and tell me that someone other than Tuula invented the close-up shot of a flower stall that peppers her feed every few rows, but I won’t believe you.
It’s also curious how rarely we see behind the carefully managed profile. All internet presence is carefully managed, sure, but in this age of oversharing and authenticity, Tuula’s image remains steadfastly in front of the camera lens and rarely, it seems, behind it. What are her dreams, passions, Netflix binges, celebrity crushes, fave Snapchat filters, makeup tips, local haunts, how does she like her coffee and has she discovered freakshakes yet? Absolutely no idea.
But in a break from tradition, Jessica Stein the person, not Tuula Vintage the blogger, has revealed she is seven months pregnant.
“I’ve always dreamed of being a mother, but never knew if I could be,” she writes. “I experienced multiple pelvic and internal injuries after being hit by a car at 16 with ongoing pain and limitations, and was warned of what might never come to be. I’ve always wanted to adopt (as my incredible mum was) and my partner and I had been talking about it again just before this unexpected miracle happened.
“With my personal history and high value of privacy I hope everyone can understand that I would not have shared this online if I didn’t feel the need to talk about the highs and lows that so many experience with challenging pregnancies. I have been struggling with antenatal depression and hope that speaking out might just help heal myself, and someone else too.”
She was admitted to hospital at 24 weeks, after being diagnosed with PPROM (Preterm premature rupture of membranes, i.e. broken waters) at 20 weeks thanks to her old bladder injury and experiencing pre-labour symptoms.
“I don’t know the words to describe how hopeless I felt… not being able to control my own body, provide for my baby or see hope that we would make it through. Despite my partner being a rock of support and positivity, I have found these last few months to be some of the loneliest of my life.
“Just days ago we experienced our first true moment of excitement and relief that things will be okay; that we have a little warrior who is beating all of the odds. I have been allowed home for the first time since late last year and the cloud of anxiety is slowly lifting.
“Thank you to the doctors, midwives and hospitals who have gone above and beyond for us, including all of the women I met while sharing hospital rooms learning about each other’s journeys. We are so grateful to have come this far and be in this position that so many can only dream to reach. We aren’t in the complete clear but know that nothing ever really is. For now we are going to lay low and enjoy every extra week of waiting to meet our miracle…”
Congrats guys <3.
Photo: Tuula Vintage / Instagram.
