It wasn’t until recently when I realised my morning routine was making me perpetually late for everything.
Here’s a bit of a breakdown of what I used to do before I realised my tardiness was becoming a bit of a problem:
- Went to bed at 1am after binge-watching anything and everything.
- Set first alarm for 6:50am.
- Ignored first alarm.
- Set second alarm for 7:20am.
- Snoozed alarm six or seven times.
- Woke up with exactly 10 minutes to shower, clean my teeth, put on clothes and sprint to the train station.
- Regret and repeat.
Yeah look, it wasn’t great. I’m sure there are worse routines out there, but the stress of just making it to the train every morning has turned exactly five of my hairs grey.
After a bit of a self-intervention (which was a refreshing change from all of the other interventions my pals have thrown me – I’m not going to change you guys stop trying to make me a better person), I decided to tweak a few things, and I’ve gotta say, I feel a lot fresher than I did a few weeks ago.
Here’s what I did:
Waited until spring ‘coz winter can get wrecked
Honestly, there was no way I was going to wake up earlier than I had to in winter. I think we can all agree that the three months of winter should be considered one long public holiday, just so none of us have to leave the house.
Actually, I’m adding the winter public holiday to my list of campaign promises. What am I campaigning for, exactly? Mind your own damn business. In saying that, Louis 2020 – spread the word.
Invested in a mini-fridge
The key to waking up on time for anything, in my humble opinion, is to invest in a little fridge to sit beside your bed.
Some fridge essentials that should get you sorted for the day or weekend:
- Beer
- 7 x Suntory BOSS iced coffee cans (one for every day of the week)
- Pre-made drinks with electrolytes
- String cheese
- 2 litres of water
- Milk (if you like to guzzle down half a litre of cow-juice like myself)
While string cheese and beer aren’t a must-have, per se, the Suntory BOSS ice coffee cans are. Here’s what to do: when that alarm buzzes, open one eye, rummage through the fridge, drink half the coffee and let yourself lie there with your eyes closed for a bit longer.
Eventually, the caffeine will kick in and you’ll be much more inclined to actually get out of bed.
I know, I know, I’m a genius. Louis 2020 guys.
Went to bed an hour earlier than I usually do
I have this odd complex where I feel like I’ll miss out on something if I go to bed too early. I don’t even know what I’d be missing out on, it’s not like people are out getting crunk and/or drunk on a Tuesday, but it’s just something that’s always stuck with me.
I decided to push through though, and I’ve been going to sleep no later than midnight. I’m more inclined to wake up early and my bag eyes have gone from making me look ‘legally dead’ to ‘maybe dying’.
Huge progress.
Asked my housemate to bang on my door
Nothing’s quite as effective as having someone else handling your responsibilities. If I have to be up by a certain time, it’s 100% everyone else’s fault if I don’t do it.
This is why I roped my housemate into ensuring there’s a knock on my door by 7:30 at the latest. She doesn’t have to get up until 8 so it’s quite inconvenient for her, but it’s an inconvenience I’m willing to put her through.
Aimed to go for at least three morning walks a week
Yeah, the keyword there is ‘aimed’. I didn’t actually do it – I’m not a psycho – but just the thought of morning exercise made me feel better.
Probably not as good as if I actually went on the walks, but still better nonetheless.
If you’re really not a morning person, just make sure you keep a coupla Suntory BOSS coffees on hand in the arvo, so after work you can power through the fatigue and get those bloody steps up.
Or just aim high, but don’t bother following through.
Louis 2020.
