All I care about at the Oscars is the fashion, and gawking at celebrity couples that normally refuse to be seen in public together. Even if they’re disgusting levels of cutesy, I still love them. They’re famous! And yet, ~just like us~ because they love other human beings!
I’m aware this is ridiculous, to give a shit about the romantic lives of random people I don’t know – people who are AT these awards because they’re actually good at other things, like acting and directing and design. But also in a very real way WHO CARES SHOW ME THE KISSY KISSY.
MELISSA MCCARTHY & BEN FALCONE
TAKUMI KAWAHARA & MARIE KONDO
Do you think Marie Kondo’s husband just lives a life of extreme calm because their house is so organised? I think yes.
TONYA LEWIS & SPIKE LEE
Look at these cute weirdos dressed like they’re on their way to the Willy Wonka factory. Adorable.
AMY ADAMS & DARREN LE GALLO
Amy is like “ILY my delightful partner” and Darren is like “when do we get to go eat In N Out burgers”.
JORDAN PEELE & CHELSEA PERRETTI
I didn’t even know these two were dating and it’s the most pure fucking thing I can imagine ever existing.
JASON MOMOA & LISA BONET
Are these the hottest people alive? YES.
Are they also the cutest people alive? EXTREMELY HARD YES.
PHARRELL WILLIAMS & HELEN LASICHANH
They both need to rethink their outfits but you cannot deny these people a) do not age and b) are cute as shit.
J.LO & ALEX RODRIGUEZ
Oh look! More people who never age.
BRADLEY COOPER & IRINA SHAYK
I am well aware actors sometimes act, but when these two look at each other this way I do NOT believe the Gaga/Bradley rumours.
SAM ROCKWELL & LESLIE BIBB
LUCY BOYNTON & RAMI MALEK
CUUUUTE with an added “I love when couples are fashionable and also met on movie sets”.
MICHAEL B JORDAN AND HIS FUCKINGGGGG MUUUUUM!!!
Obviously NOT a couple but I could not write this without including the most adorable, ovary-bursting, oh-shit-I’m-pregante from adorableness thing that happened on the red carpet.