How do you do my fair gentlemen, gentleladies and Theyn Austens? I’m sure you’ve heard it through talk in the town, or by letter, that Dakota Johnson is starring in Netflix’s film adaptation of Jane Austen‘s Persuasion. Well, it seems the townsfolk aren’t too pleased with the movie and are dragging it for filth.
Nothing could persuade me to watch a movie more than Dakota Johnson doing an English accent while being torn between the insanely hot Henry Golding and the equally as mesmerising Cosmo Jarvis. Sounds pretty perfect, right?
However, it seems that not all is well in the world of Netflix’s Persuasion.
Before we get into why the film is being roasted, let’s watch the trailer, which is honestly fkn great.
There’s always the one that got away. 💌— NetflixFilm (@NetflixFilm) July 15, 2022
PERSUASION—starring Dakota Johnson, Cosmo Jarvis & Henry Golding, based on the beloved novel by Jane Austen—is now on Netflix. pic.twitter.com/DUEVrdb8P8
The main problem folks are having with the flick? Well, it tries to make the language modern while keeping it set in 1817. Jane Austen did not put her whole Austenussy into this novel for us to tarnish it like this.
The film also features Dakota constantly looking into the camera directly like a Fleabag character.
Friends, Fleabag came out in 2016. We didn’t need to bring back that comedic shtick.
netflix really gave us Persuasion and said “here’s dakota johnson doing her worst and annoyingly painful fleabag impression enjoy”— Rachael (@markruffaloTD) July 15, 2022
The PERSUASION embargo is up so I can finally say that it is the worst Austen adaptation I have ever seen. Absolutely inexcusable. Abolish Netflix. Abolish Dakota Johnson.— Morgan Leigh Davies (@MLDavies) July 8, 2022
Let’s briefly talk about how the director thought it was a brilliant idea to remove most of the Jane Austen language from the film.
What would be better than hearing Dakota Johnson say “You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope?” Give the people what they want!
Instead, we have her saying lines like “He’s a ten. And I never trust a ten.”
I need a breather.
jane austen crying shaking throwing up in her grave after dakota johnson said “now we’re worse than exes, we’re friends” in persuasion on netflix— biryani (@whysopain) July 15, 2022
the letter was included in the movie, however, that scene was as terribly executed as the other scenes. persuasion is such a complex novel, it is regarded as jane austen's most mature work, but, sadly, the writers failed to convey its essence.— sandra༄ (@intoloveonly) July 17, 2022
every time Dakota Johnson says “I’ve been PERSUADED” in Persuasion she looks at the camera and winks and I’m a little bit sick in my mouth— nicole archer (@nicolearcher) July 16, 2022
Currently watching “Persuasion” and I don’t know who Dakota Johnson’s character is because THIS is no Anne Elliot.— Lonyia Taylor (@MagnificentLoni) July 15, 2022
Despite all the hate Persuasion is getting online, it has been praised for its brilliant representation.
There are quite a few POC on the cast, which never happens in Jane Austen adaptations.
It’s a shame that so many people are ganging up on the movie while not appreciating it for what it is, but hey, criticism and praise can coexist!
stop blaming bridgerton for netflix persuasion being bad and start blaming the real enemy. dakota johnson’s hairstylist— nia (@sofiabikes) July 15, 2022
I just saw a clip from the new Persuasion where Dakota Johnson as Anne Elliot says “but he’s a ten and I never trust a ten” and like?????? If you’re going to make it that modern than why not just do a contemporary romcom adaptation???? I?????— Emma ✨🚀💫🌌 (@leiahuttslayer) July 15, 2022
Points were made here TBH.
Why didn’t they just bring the story of Persuasion into the modern world? I would have frothed the movie so hard.
Anyway, let’s look at some more memes.
Jane Austen did not write persuasion and “Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death.” For y’all to go and use bEcAUSe hEs a tEN pic.twitter.com/4bxW4UJb8G— Sof 🌸 (@schofiaa) July 15, 2022
What is (preemptively) pissing me off about the new Persuasion is that it speaks to a much, much larger problem in adaptations of classics where studios seem to think all these female characters need to be glossed with a zany millennial girlboss patina to become Relevant™️— meha (@chaipters) July 8, 2022
i will not be the person who fact-checks all of persuasion, because props are the least of this movie's problems.— Kathryn VanArendonk (@kvanaren) July 15, 2022
green table grapes were not really a thing until the late 19th c and chocolate chip cookies were invented in the 1930s. pic.twitter.com/PfwlKzFA13
Do not get between a Jane Austen fanatic and their literature, I’ll tell you what.
Some of these online reviews are absolutely scathing.
currently streaming netflix's persuasion </3 pic.twitter.com/I1NeMF5Cpk— mina le (@gremlita) July 15, 2022
so far i’ve heard the new netflix persuasion has these horrifying lines:— M ✨🔭 (@m_bee4) July 9, 2022
—“It’s often said if you’re a 5 in London, you’re a 10 in Bath.”
—"I'm an empath…"
—“now we’re worse than exes, we’re FRIENDS”
haven’t we as a society suffered enough!?!?!!
The problem with the Netflix Persuasion is it insults the audience’s intelligence. It assumes the original material isn’t relatable to modern viewers. Except if that were the case there wouldn’t be a new Austen remake coming out every 2 years.— Sarah Cameron (@thesarjane) July 15, 2022
Persuasion girlies this is not gonna be our year pic.twitter.com/qVn2knly1n— anna (@orphansirius) July 8, 2022
I’m gonna find every single person who was involved in the persuasion production and put them in jail— leslie/seeun (@crcwsss) July 15, 2022
I was so excited to watch Netflix's persuasion even after the initial reviews. Having watched it, I am still in disbelief over the absolute trainwreck it was. They made Anne into a shell of a character. What a waste. I need to purge myself of this crime. Sally Hawkins, ILY.— Hareem (@Hareeems) July 15, 2022
Me telling Jane Austen what Carrie Cracknell did to Persuasion pic.twitter.com/J5hz6GkUVM— Ella ➰🧣📖 (@daisyradlett) July 8, 2022
Getting more enjoyment out of reading peoples angry reviews of the Netflix persuasion film than I would out of any Jane Austen adaptation.— James (@Spookik_) July 15, 2022
All of this hate is kind of making me want to watch the movie more. Honestly, I’ll do anything to see more Henry Golding.