A UK Site Wrote About MAFS Stars Rooting In A Loo So Tell Me Again That Australia Has No Culture

mafs

Wow, MAFS 2022 really is the gift that has kept on giving. The show finished in April but we’re still talking about some of the couples. That is the power of television (and the power of Olivia Frazer, apparently).

The latest MAFS goss is a blind item from a UK gossip site, so it must be taken with a large grain of salt. However, with MAFS stars being the way they are, it’s also the most believable bit of tea you’ll find on the Internet today.

Let’s dive in!

It all started when the Herald Sun wrote up a spicy little yarn about why reality TV stars don’t get invited to the Logies. Pretty standard fare, but within its story was the little nugget that during a swanky bar opening in Sydney, one couple from the 2022 MAFS season disappeared into the toot for a little interlude of oral sex.

WHAAAAT?

I mean look, who hasn’t felt the urge to slurp on a knob after slurping a few espresso martinis? (It’s me, I haven’t.) But I’m not one to judge! Why not embrace these very natural urges when they pop up. Don’t let the fact that you’re in a public establishment deter you!

The Herald Sun got their tea from “a UK gossip site”. Some digging revealed this site is Popbitch, which is kind of like a UK version of Deuxmoi and has been around for decades.

The latest season of MAFS has aired in the UK, meaning the stars are fodder for international gossip sites.

Popbitch’s short and sweet piece reads as follows:

A number of Married At First Sight stars attended the launch of a swanky new bar in Sydney last night. The hospitality was obviously pretty lavish as one couple from the latest series was getting increasingly frisky as the night wore on, nipping off to the bogs together so that she could give him a sneaky blowie.

Unfortunately, the groom had had such a skinful that he couldn’t get it up, so their first attempt was unsuccessful. As was their second. And their third.

How do we know? Because after each failed attempt the couple returned to their table and gave the other guests a detailed debrief of their fruitless efforts.

So whomst could it be? While I’d love it to be Domenica Calarco and Jack Millar, they’re still keeping it vague as to whether they’re still together. And MAFS dream couple Ella Ding and Brent Vitiello confirmed they’re donezo.

It must be someone else, based in Sydney, who is still together. I’m not naming names but one couple fits that bill. Surely reality TV goss queen So Dramatic can clear this up, but for now, I’m off to read a book and regain some brain cells.

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