The couple swap on MAFS was so ludicrously bonkers and stressful that I had to take a cold shower and reapply deodorant. I’m not being a silly bugger when I say there was so much screaming and fighting that my throat feels hoarse in solidarity.

Because the producers of MAFS are evil geniuses who will stop at nothing to torment their guinea pigs, Harrison had to move in with Melinda, and Layton had to bunk with Bronte. Insert gif of Dr. Evil cackling and furiously patting Mr. Bigglesworth.

Within mere seconds of barging into Melinda and Layton’s boardroom and sitting on the couch, Harrison managed to make them kick off and start debating “principles” and “returns on investment” like their CommSec accounts depended on it.

I’m not joking when I say their biff went from zero to one billion quick. Like, I honestly can’t tell you what Melinda and Layon were fighting about — it was just stomping around their Sky Suites prison cell and Mr CEO showing off his Spanx while Harrison sat on the couch like a petulant child.

MAFS Fans Repulsed Yet Impressed That Harrison Merely Had To Sit On The Couch To Ruin Another Relo
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But he was not simply a sooky boy; Harrison was a man baby with a dastardly scheme to ruin Melinda and Layton. And he managed to achieve such simply by saying, like, four words and sitting on the couch.

The good people of Twitter were disgusted, nay impressed, that he managed to achieve so much by doing so little.

Folks were also racking their brains trying to figure out why TF Melinda and Layton were playing into Harrison’s manipulative hand and indulging him with an argument.

Watching them fight probably sent him into a state of horny delirium.

My brain is still spinning. If you are similarly confused, you can read all about tonight’s episode via our gorgy recap.

If you’re still chomping at the bit for MAFS-related gossip, you can sign up to our newsletter here or give our podcast We’ve Done The MAFS (hehe) a listen.

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Image: Married At First Sight / Channel 9