Things I Don’t Need To See Anymore On Locky’s Season Of Bachie: That Fucking Chest Tattoo

locky gilbert tattoo

We’re only two episodes into The Bachelor and everyone already fucking HATES Locky’s stupid chest tattoo.

Attention all tattoo artists: if a man comes into your work asking for a Ben Cousins-esque chest tattoo, say no. Please, I’m begging you. For the greater good of society, we do not need another fake woke chest tattoo. No “such is life”, no “strength & honour” and no whatever that dumb thing Chad Hurst had on Big Brother.

As a society, we have progressed past the need for dumb chest tattoos. And as a card-carrying member of the Boycott Ugly Chest Tattoos Society, I feel the need to talk about it.

You see, we’ve got Locky. He seems like a nice enough guy, pretty normal, maybe not your personal cup of tea but the sort of guy you’d be happy for your friend to bring on a double date. However, he just ruins it with that horrible fuckboy stamp.


Seriously, how has nobody called it the fuck out yet?

Or at least gotten a matching tattoo to win his heart?

Channel 10, if you’re reading this, please give us a tattoo-removal date. It’s truly what we deserve.

We have progressed past the need for no ragrets tattoos. Stop it, you’re not Ben Cousins and we’re not playing footy.

Now, as somebody with a The Simpsons joke permanently inked on my body, I probably shouldn’t comment on anyone else’s tattoo choice. But you know what? I’m going to because this tattoo is horrible.

We’re only two episodes in and I cannot unsee this monstrosity.

Oh, and don’t get me started on whatever tf is on his neck. MAKE. IT. STOP.